It is necessary to be reasonable and flexible enough to avoid conflicts as much as possible and live in peace with others. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} If you have done all your best to avoid conflicts and you are still arguing, then read these effective tips on how to avoid conflicts.

● Don't get in the center of the conflict.

    Sometimes people can get in the center of conflicts due to their enthusiasm for offering help. Frankly speaking, it is very unwise, because it can make you the main figure of the conflict. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} You should focus on your own life issues.

● Be kind.

    {#blank#}3{#/blank#} Life is full of conflicts and disagreements, that's why you should find more conservative ways of dealing with them. For example, kindness can lessen the conflict.

● Try to be a peacekeeper.

    Peacekeepers tend to cooperate with people without bad emotions which usually lead to arguments and even conflicts. “{#blank#}4{#/blank#}” This saying is the life motto of a natural-born peacekeeper. Don't worry if you are not a natural-born peacekeeper; you can gain this skill during life.

● Walk off.

    When the conflict is gathering pace and you can't manage to control yourself, you should choose to handle the situation in another way. By all means, try to keep yourself away from stress. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} You should get away from the situation for a while.

Pleasure and Enjoyment

    When considering the kind of experience that makes life better, most people first think that happiness consists in experiencing pleasure: good food, all the comforts that money can buy. We imagine the satisfaction of traveling to exciting places or being surrounded by expensive devices. If we cannot afford those goals, then we are happy to settle for a quiet evening in front of the television set with a drink close by.

    Pleasure is a feeling of contentment that one achieves whenever expectations set by biological programs or by social conditioning have been met. The taste of food when we are hungry is pleasant because it reduces a physiological (生理的) imbalance. Resting in the evening while passively absorbing information from TV, with alcohol or drugs to dull the mind overexcited by the demands of work, is pleasantly relaxing. Traveling to Acapulco is pleasant because the exciting novelty (新奇) restores our sensations (感觉) exhausted by the repetitive routines of everyday life.

    When people think further about what makes their lives rewarding, they tend to move beyond pleasant memories and begin to remember other events, other experiences that overlap(重叠) with pleasurable ones but fall into a category that deserves a separate name: enjoyment. Enjoyable events occur when a person has not only met some expectation or satisfied a need or a desire but also gone beyond what he or she has been programmed to do and achieved something unexpected, perhaps something even unimagined before.

    Enjoyment is characterized by this forward movement: by a sense of novelty, of accomplishment. Playing a close game of tennis that stretches one's ability is enjoyable, as is reading a book that reveals things in a new light, as is having a conversation that leads us to express ideas we didn't know we had. Closing a contested business deal, or any piece of work well done, is enjoyable. None of these experiences may be particularly pleasurable at the time they are taking place, but afterward we think back on them and say, “That really was fun” and wish they would happen again. After an enjoyable event we know that we have changed, that our self has grown: in some respect, we have become more complex as a result of it.

    Experiences that give pleasure can also give enjoyment, but the two sensations are quite different. For instance, everybody takes pleasure in eating. To enjoy food, however, is more difficult. A gourmet (美食家) enjoys eating, as does anyone who pays enough attention to a meal so as to discriminate the various sensations provided by it. As this example suggests, we can experience pleasure without any investment of psychic energy, whereas enjoyment happens only as a result of unusual investments of attention. A person can feel pleasure without any effort, but it is impossible to enjoy a tennis game, a book, or a conversation unless attention is fully concentrated on the activity.

Pleasure and Enjoyment

Music is a Universal Language

    “Music is the universal language of mankind.” – Henry Longfellow

    Everyone has the inborn ability to understand and enjoy music. There are many theories as to why this is, but it has become a part of human beings. Since the beginning, humans have expressed themselves through music. Simple tribal rhythms evolved into many types of more complex music, including classical, rock, jazz, and R&B. While the styles between these many types of music may vary, everyone is able to understand and relate to them.

    What are the essential parts of a language? Every language uses vocabulary, or a set of words, to create sentences that convey messages. The tone and style of the sentences convey different feelings or emotions. Music is exactly the same way. Twelve tones, or notes, are combined to create phrases that also convey emotion. Music can even be written, like most other languages. Conversations even take place in music. Two saxophonists can play melodies back and forth, expressing different styles and feelings, building off of each other, responding to each other. Music changes over the years like other languages. Most people who speak fluent English cannot read one of Shakespeare's plays because the language has changed so much. Music is also affected by time, and over a long period, many new types of music and instruments have emerged to create different sounds and convey different messages. There are so many similarities between vocal language and music that they must be same.

    I recently had a chance to experience conversation through music. In 2008, I traveled to Manila, Philippines to participate in a high school jazz exchange where many students from all over Asia came together to share their talents. Everyone was mixed into different small groups to prepare for a concert at the end of week. Few people spoke fluent English so vocal communication was very tough. However, it wasn't needed. Everyone seemed to understand each other simply through the music and there were few times where direct translation was needed. At the performance, every group played for a live audience. They all sounded phenomenal and it felt like they were in perfect time and harmony. During my group's performance, I was able to improvise with a Korean boy who spoke very little English. But we managed to have a conversation through our instruments, building off each other's riffs until we were creating our own melody on the fly. It was a great experience.

    Because of the many similarities that music shares with other languages, it is a very effective way to communicate with others. Music brings us together, connects us with other people, and allows us to express ourselves in ways that are different from speech and writing. It has the ability to convey emotions and messages to the core of people, which is why Henry Longfellow is absolutely correct when he states that “music is the universal language of mankind.”

    Music is a Universal Language

    It is easy to miss amid the day-to-day headlines of global economic recession, but there is a less obvious kind of social upheaval（剧变）underway that is fast changing both the face of the planet and the way human beings live. That change is the rapid growth in urbanization. In 2008, for the first time in human history, more than half the world's population was living in towns and cities. And as a recently published paper shows, the process of urbanization will only accelerate in the decades to come—with an enormous impact on biodiversity and potentially on climate change.

    As Karen Seto, the lead author of the paper, points out, the wave of urbanization isn't just about the migration of people into urban environments, but about the environments themselves becoming bigger to provide enough room for all those people. The rapid expansion of urban areas will have a huge impact on biodiversity hotspots and on carbon emissions in those urban areas.

    Humans are the ultimate invasive species-when they move into new territory, they often displace the wildlife that was already living there. And as land is cleared for those new cities—especially in the dense tropical forests-carbon will be released into the atmosphere as well. It's true that as people in developing nations move from the countryside to the city, the shift may reduce the pressure on land, which could in turn be good for the environment. This is especially so in desperately poor countries, where residents in the countryside slash and burn forests each growing season to clear space for farming. But the real difference is that in developing nations, the move from rural areas to cities often leads to an accompanying increase in income—and that increase leads to an increase in the consumption of food and energy, which in turn causes a rise in carbon emissions. Getting enough to eat and enjoying the safety and comfort of living fully on the grid is certainly a good thing-but it does carry an environmental price.

    The urbanization wave can't be stopped—and it shouldn't be. But Seto's paper does underscore the importance of managing that transition. If we do it the right way, we can reduce urbanization's impacts on the environment “There's an enormous opportunity here, and a lot of pressure and responsibility to think about how we urbanize,” says Seto. “One thing that's clear is that we can't build cities the way we have over the last couple of hundred years. The scale of this transition won't allow that.” We're headed towards an urban planet no matter what, but whether it becomes heaven or hell is up to us.

    Patrick and Rachel Hugens have biked around the world. The Hugenses, who live in Boise when not on their bikes, are 25 months into their latest round-the-world adventure, scheduled to end in March. They've visited 36 countries on this tour, touching Europe, Africa, Asia and South America. “Traveling by bike is the greatest freedom," Rachel said via email. “You can see people's daily lives and can communicate with them.”

    Rachel warns, “Cycle touring can become addictive.” Bike tourism is on the rise in the United States and around the world, according to the Adventure Cycling Association. The U. S. Bicycle Route System has grown 66 percent in the past two years and now has a presence in 24 states, including Idaho, and the District of Columbia.

    Dennis Swift，secretary of the Southwest Idaho Mountain Biking Association, rode across the U.S. last year- from Seattle to Salem, Mass. Six people started the tour and three finished, riding 52 out of 56 days. They averaged about 60 miles per riding day. Swift also rode through the Basque Country with a group of Boise cyclists last year. He's planning to participate in a Virginia bike tour this year. “When you get older, your health is most important,” he said. “My mom had Alzheimer's disease. They say what's good for health is good for the brain, so riding is one thing to be first in my life.”

    This is the third time that the couple have quit their jobs to tour. Rachel is a nurse; Patrick is an architect. Both regained their former jobs when they returned home in 2000 and 2007. They're uncertain what will happen this time. They've given themselves a chance to save extra money by going to work by bike and avoiding some bills that are basic for most (cell phones, cable TV).“Traveling changes your view of money and what it can do for you,” Rachel said. “We've met some cyclists traveling long term. They have many reasons to spend wisely.”

    “The fellow cyclists we meet mostly come from Britain, Germany, Spain, Holland, Australia or New Zealand," Rachel said, “It is so nice to see that people all over the world are friendly and welcoming.”

    This past week I was assigned to go without technology for six hours for study. I assumed that it was going to be impossible. Nowadays, people have become so dependent on technology. We are so addicted to it that we will panic when we can't remember where we have put our phone.

    I began my day at 9 am, turning off my phone. I grabbed my wrist watch and some textbooks and set off for my day. I went to a coffee shop for breakfast and as I sat down, instead of pulling out my phone, I pulled out the book I was currently reading. As I ate my bread, I felt like it was more delicious and that I could actually enjoy reading because I wasn't checking my phone every few seconds. I could actually appreciate what I was reading and absorb it. I had entertainment and I was able to keep track of time with my watch.

    In the afternoon I found myself in the library, I had to study for an upcoming math test. So the lack of technology was actually a blessing for me. I took out my textbooks and began to work on writing out all the definitions I had to learn in pencil. During the process, I found that I just never had the patience or attention span before.

    Those six hours taught me that we don't really need technology. We have just psychologically tricked our brains into thinking that we need to constantly be on it, checking what our friends are doing and making sure we are also doing something. Technology constantly bombards (轰击) us with information. That day I wasn't stressed over why a friend of mine was texting me, and I was just doing something for myself. Technology takes away all the simple moments, which we now take for granted because we are so addicted to it that we don't take the time to notice the world and the small things around us.