阅读理解 One evening at a busy crossroads, I noticed a sister struggling to keep her little kid under control while she talked on the pay phone. She wanted him to stay still next to her, but he wanted to run and play by the road, close to rushing buses and taxis. One could sense the woman's frustration, that she was pulled in too many directions: She was angry at the person on the telephone and shouting at the younger that she would “snap(折断)his leg” if he moved again. As I waited for the traffic light to change, the child began to complain and struggle to free himself from the woman's grasp. She dropped the phone, seized(抓住)the neck of his tiny. T-shirt and gave him a back-hand blow across the face that I know made his little head spin.
The light changed, and passers-by continued on their way. But I stood there, fixed to the pavement. I knew this extremely upset woman would carry through on her threat of violence to the child. Before, I had wanted to get close to her and offer to watch the youngster while she dealt with the troubling situation on the phone. Now I wanted to comfort the little boy. I also wanted to speak to the sister to calm her and to caution(告诫)her, as I wish someone had cautioned me when I was passing my pain on to my daughter and causing her emotional suffering. But I was chicken. I thought, she may think I'm out of line, or I may be her next target.
Often I've thought about that child and the many others abused(虐待)by adults. I wonder how they will internalize(使……藏在心底)their pain, and if it will crush their spirits. Will this little boy grow up to be an abusive man? Will he be gloomy(阴郁的,沮丧的)and withdrawn(孤僻,内向的)? Will he find it hard to communicate with women, with other men? Or will he survive and be sensitive, caring and determined not to continue the cycle?
There is too much cruelty(残忍)in the world, too much cruelty between people. I tremble at the increasing verbal(言语的)bitterness and violence among Black girls, and among young mothers trying to discipline their children. This behavior isn't class-or age-related: I hear sharp words from Black women from all walks of life who are overworked and stressed out and have grown impatient. At times I, too, become impolite to others, or, like the sister on the phone, strike out at(抨击)those closest to me.
Often we're tired because we've made the wrong choices. Young girls who still need mothering are loaded with children. We sisters easily get hurt and annoyed when we don't compromise with our own sense of self. Our personal fulfillment requires knowing what is best for us, setting our boundaries(界限)and keeping them undamaged. We will always be asked to do more than we are comfortable doing. When we know our boundaries, we can decline comfortably. People—and we ourselves—will act in ways we don't like. But they, like us, are still worthy of love.
Whatever irritates(激怒)us about a person should be examined. Is the person reflecting behavior in us that needs to be changed? Often, when I find people irritating, I find they mirror something about me that I need to correct.
What's needed in our personal relationships is a return to gentleness and tolerance(容忍). We must allow one another our learning experiences. Just as violence results to violence, verbal violence—the hard words and sharp tones we use to release inner stress—adds to the distance between us.
What we people of African root must do to become, and continue to be strong begins with love, sensitivity and our ability to work together. We Black women have these spiritual resources in abundance(丰富). Now we must encourage them to create a peaceful place—for ourselves, our children, our men.