How to Make Friends

    Friendship is a very important human relationship and everyone needs good friends. Good friendship has many benefits. It offers companionship, improves self-worth and promotes (促进) good health. There are times in our lives such as when we have recently moved into a new town, or changed our jobs or schools. Such changes often leave us without a friend. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} But for many of us the process is difficult and requires courage. Below are some helpful suggestions on how to make and keep friends.

● Associate with (与……交往) others.

    The first step to making friends is associating with other people. You can go to public places to meet new people. Besides, you will need to make yourself known by becoming an active member of such places.

● Start a conversation.

    Starting a conversation is the second most important step in making new friends. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} You can always start the conversation. Being able to make small talk is a very useful skill in relating with other people.

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    Choosing friends with common interests is important in building friendship as these interests would always bring you and your friend together. Hanging out (闲逛) will always be a pleasant experience.

● Let it grow.

    It is a good thing to stay in touch. However, try not to press your new friend with calls, messages or visits as this would likely wear him or her out and finally you may lose your friend.{#blank#}4{#/blank#} The best friendships are the ones that grow naturally.

● Enjoy your friendship.

    The best way to enjoy your friendship is to allow your friends to be themselves. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} Try not to change them from who they are to what you want them to be. Become the kind of friend you will want your friend to be to you.

A. Do things together.

B. Be cheerful.

C. Making new friends comes easy for some people.

D. So you will need to give your friend time to respond to you.

E. Do not wait to be spoken to.

F. For a friendship to develop you need to stay in touch.

G. Try not to find fault with your friends.

    We have two daughters: Kristen is seven years old and Kelly is four. Last Sunday evening, we invited some people home for dinner. I dressed them nicely for the party, and told them that their job was to join Mommy in answering the door when the bell rang. Mommy would introduce them to the guests, and then they would take the guests' coats upstairs and put them on the bed in the second bedroom.

    The guests arrived. I introduced my two daughters to each of them. The adults were nice and kind and said how lucky we were to have such good kids.

    Each of the guests made a particular fuss over Kelly, the younger one, admiring her dress, her hair and her smile. They said she was a remarkable girl to be carrying coats upstairs at her age.

    I thought to myself that we adults usually make a big "to do" over the younger one because she's the one who seems more easily to be hurt. We do it with the best of intentions.

    But we seldom think of how it might affect the other child. I was a little worried that Kristen would feel she was being outshone. I was about to serve dinner when I realized that she had been missing for twenty minutes. I ran upstairs and found her in the bedroom, crying.

    I said, "What are you doing, my dear?"

    She turned to me with a sad expression and said, "Mommy, why don't people like me the way they like my sister? Is it because I'm not pretty? Is that why they don't say nice things about me as much?"

    I tried to explain to her, kissing and hugging her to make her feel better.

    Now, whenever I visit a friend's home, I make it a point to speak to the elder child first.

    Many people all over the world enjoy an alcoholic drink, such as wine or beer, during dinner. Many people raise a glass of alcohol to celebrate a wedding or a birthday. And having drinks after work with friends and co-workers is called "happy hour".

    All these situations are considered "social drinking" because they happen at social events. But when does "social drinking" become problem drinking?

    According to the World Health Organization alcohol abuse kills 3.3 million people each year. That is six percent of all deaths around the world. And in a new report on alcohol use around the world, the WHO says alcohol can create dependency, or addiction, in some people. The report also warns that alcohol use can increase the risk of developing more than 200 diseases, including some kinds of cancers. And, the WHO says alcohol abuse can put people at greater risk of infectious diseases, such as tuberculosis(肺结核), pneumonia (肺炎)and HIV.

    WHO Mental Health and Substance Abuse Director Shekhar Saxena says the organization is concerned about drinking among young people between the ages 15 and 19. And it is most concerned about "binge-drinking", or an extended period of heavy drinking.

    The report concludes that worldwide 16 percent of drinkers over the age of 15 engage in binge-drinking, which is much more harmful than other kind of drinking and causes the most harm in terms of accidents, self-harm and harm to others. High income countries have the highest alcohol consumption and also the highest prevalence(盛行) of binge-drinking.

    The report also found that the highest rates of alcohol-linked deaths are in Europe, followed by the West Pacific and then the Americans. The report also finds Europe is the area with the highest alcohol use. Central and Eastern Europe are especially high.

    The World Health Organization suggests ways countries can protect people from alcohol abuse. These include increasing taxes on alcohol sales, raising the drinking age limit, and controlling the marketing of alcoholic beverages.

    Whenever we see a button, we are eager to press it because we know something will happen. This is true in most cases, for example on a doorbell and on the “on/off” button on the TV. But some buttons are actually fake, like the “close” button on a lift.

    Many people are in the habit of pressing the “close” button because they don't have the patience to wait for the lift doors to shut. But lifts, “close” buttons are a complete scam, at least in the US—the doors will not close any faster no matter how hard you press.

    It started in the 1990s when the Americans with Disabilities Act was passed in the US, making sure that all lifts stayed open long enough so that people with disabilities could enter. Only US firefighters and repairmen can use the buttons to speed up the door-closing process if they have a code or special keys.

    But to normal lift riders, the buttons aren't completely useless. According to psychologists, fake buttons can actually make you feel better by offering you a sense of control.

    “Perceived (能够感知的) control is very important. It reduces stress and increases well-being,” Ellen J. Langer, a psychology professor, said, “Having a lack of control is associated with depression.”

    Experts have revealed that a lot of buttons that don't do anything exist in our lives for this same purpose. For example, many offices in the US have fake thermostats (温度调节器) because people tend to feel better when they think they can control the temperature in their workspace.

    But psychologists found it interesting that even when people are aware of these little “white lies”, they still continue to push fake buttons because as long as the doors eventually close, it is considered to be worth the effort.

    “That habit is here to stay,” John Kounios, a psychology professor, said, ''Even though I have real doubts about the traffic light buttons, I always press them. After all, I've got nothing else to do while waiting. So why not press the button in the hope that this one will work?”

    The recession (衰退) of 2008-09 was remarkable in rich countries for its intensity, the following recovery for its weakness. The labour market has also broken the rules, as new research from the OECD, a think-tank of mainly rich countries, shows in its annual Employment Outlook.

    Young people always suffer in recessions. Employers stop hiring them; and they often get rid of new recruits because they are easier to dismiss. But in previous episodes, such as the recessions of the 1970s, 1980s and 1990s, older workers were also kicked off. This time is different. During the financial crisis in 2008, and since, they have done better than other age groups.

    The researchers focus on movements in "non-employment" as a share of the total population in three age groups between the final quarters of 2007 and 2012. This measure has the advantage of including not just unemployment, where people are looking for work, but also inactivity, where people are not seeking jobs. Whereas the average non-employment rate in the OECD has risen by four percentage points among young people and by one-and-a-half points among 25-to 54-year-olds, it has fallen by two points among the 55-64 age group.

    Why have older employees done so well? In some southern European countries they benefit from job protection not afforded to younger workers, but that did not really help them in past recessions. What has changed, says Stefano Scarpetta, head of the OECD's employment directorate, is that firms now bear the full costs of getting rid of older staff. In the past, early-retirement policies provided by governments (in the mistaken belief that these would help young people) made it cheaper to push grey-haired workers out of the door. These have largely stopped.

    Many will argue that older workers have done better at the expense of the young. That view is wrongheaded. First, it is a fallacy that a job gained for one person is a job lost for another; there is no fixed amount of work. And second, as the report shows, young and old people are by and large not substitutes in the workplace. They do different types of work in different types of occupation: younger people are keen on IT firms, for example, whereas older folk tend to be employed in more traditional industries. There are plenty of things that should be done to help the young jobless, but kicking older workers out of the workplace is not one of them.