“We are good mothers,” I said to my friend, as we sat on our comfortable beach chairs under our beach umbrella and watched our children playing in the waves.

    Out of nowhere, the children took off running. About fifty yards from us, a man—maybe in his fifties—was fishing. The children stood next to him and watched with their little mouths hanging open as he cast the fishing lines. He smiled at them. They ran back to us—all except my three-year-old daughter, Drew.

    My heart beat fast with horror. “Drew! Come here! Play with your friends!” I shouted, very aware that my speeches about not talking to strangers weren't working. It seemed that many parents heard of horrible stories about children being taken away by strangers. Responsible mothers should teach their children that the world is a dangerous place. So I felt relieved (松口气) when Drew ran towards me and took hold of a shovel (铲子). Then she looked me in the eye: “I want to be with the person.”

    Again, she approached the middle-aged man, and started digging next to him.

    Several seconds later, she returned, waving something shiny.

    “Look, Mommy! A toy fish!”

    It was, indeed, a toy fish—yellow and rubber. This must have been what he was using to attract the fish. And he'd given it to Drew. The three other children were deeply impressed, and they didn't try to hide how jealous(妒忌的)they were—clearly, they all wanted the fish.

    “My friend gave me that fish!” Drew shouted loudly. The sand in front of the umbrella turned into a preschool cage match with a yellow rubber fish flying through the air. I felt like I might cry myself.

    Unexpectedly, there he was: the man, standing right next to us with three more rubber fish in hand. He handed them to each of the children. By their faces, you would have thought he was actually the really kind big brother.

    “Thank you,” I said, realizing that there is good and kindness in strangers.

    In 1971 a young man who grew up very poor was traveling across the country, trying to make a new start for himself. Along the way he had completely run out of（用光了...） money and was forced to spend the night in his car. This continued until one morning, after a week of sleeping in his car, he walked nervously into a restaurant and ordered a big breakfast.

    After eating his first good meal in weeks, he found himself lying to the waiter, telling him he had lost his wallet. The waiter, who was also the owner, walked behind the chair where the young man had been sitting. He bent down, and came up with a $20 bill that looked as if it had fallen on the floor and said, “Son, you must have dropped this,”the owner said. The young man couldn't believe his luck! He quickly paid for the breakfast, left a tip, bought gas with the change, and headed West.

    On the way out of town, he began to understand what the owner did. Maybe nobody dropped the money at all.“Maybe that fellow just knew I was in trouble and he helped me in a way that didn't embarrass(使尴尬)me. So I just made a promise to help other people if I can.”

    Later, he worked very hard and became a rich man. Now he lives near Kansas City. Each year he gives away thousands of dollars. He is known as the “Secret Santa” because at Christmas time each year, he personally hands money out to those on the street and at restaurants. Last year, he gave more than $50,000 away in Kansas City.

    There are so many expressions in American English that sound pleasant but are not.

    “Face the music” is a good example. When someone says they have to face the music, it does not mean they are going to a musical performance or concert. To face the music means to accept the unpleasant results of an action.

    Imagine a friend asks you to take care of her beautiful red sports car. She gives you the keys and says, “Thanks so much for watching my car while I'm away. But please do not drive it. It is an extremely fast car.” But you do not listen. You want to show off and pretend the car is yours. So, you drive it around town. As bad luck would have it, you lose control of the car and drive it into a stop sign. The damage is serious. When your friend returns, you must tell her what you have done and “face the music”. That could mean losing her friendship or paying for repairs to her sports car or both. Whatever the music is, you must face it.

    There are other American expressions that mean the same as “face the music”.

    To “take your medicine” means to accept the results from something bad you have done. And if someone says, “You made your bed. Now lie in it.” He means you created a bad situation and now you will experience the results, or as we say in American spoken English, you must deal with it!

    “Pay the piper” also means the same as “face the music”. But, that expression has its own very interesting beginning. We will talk about that on another Words and Their Stories.

    British children used to play conkers (板栗游戏) in the autumn when the horse-chestnut trees started to drop their shiny brown nuts. They would select a suitable chestnut, drill a hole in it and thread it onto a string, then swing their conker at that of an opponent until one of them broke. But the game has fallen out of favour. Children spend less time outdoors and rarely have access to chestnut trees. Besides, many schools have banned conkers games, worried that they might cause injuries or nut allergies.

    That sort of risk-averseness(规避风险) now spreads through every aspect of childhood. Playgrounds have all the excitement designed out of them to make them safe. Many governments, particularly in societies such as America, have tightened up their rules, requiring parents to supervise(监管) young children far more closely than in the past. Frank Furedi of the University of Kent, a critic on modern parenting, argues that allowing children to play unsupervised or leaving them at home alone is increasingly described as a symptom of irresponsible parenting.

    In part, such increased caution is a response to the huge wave of changes. Large-scale urbanization, smaller and more mobile families, the move of women into the labor market and the digitization of many aspects of life have unavoidably changed the way that people bring up their children. There is little chance that any of these trends will be changed, so today's more intensive(精细化 ) parenting style is likely to go on.

    Such parenting practices now embraced by wealthy parents in many parts of the rich world, particularly in America, go far beyond an adjustment to changes in external conditions. They mean a strong bid to ensure that the advantages enjoyed by the parents' generation are passed on to their children. Since success in life now turns mainly on education, such parents will do their best to provide their children with the schooling, the character training and the social skills that will secure access to the best universities and later the most attractive jobs.

    To some extent that has always been the case. But there are more such parents now, and they are competing with each other for what economists call positional goods. This competition starts even before the children are born. The wealthy classes will take their time to select a suitable spouse and get married, and will start a family only when they feel ready for it.

    Children from less advantaged backgrounds, by contrast, often appear before their parents are ready for them. In America 60% of births to single women under 30 are unplanned, and over 40% of children are born outside marriage. The result, certainly in America, has been to widen already massive social inequalities yet further.

    All the evidence suggests that children from poorer backgrounds are at a disadvantage almost as soon as they are born. By the age of five or six they are far less "school-ready" than their better-off peers, so any attempts to help them catch up have to start long before they get to school. America has had some success with various schemes involving regular home visits by nurses or social workers to low-income families with new babies. It also has long experience with programmes for young children from poor families that combine support for parents with good-quality child care. Such programmes do seem to make a difference. Without extra effort, children from low-income families in most countries are much less likely than their better-off peers to attend preschool education, even though they are more likely to benefit from it. And data from the OECD's PISA programme suggest that children need at least two years of preschool education to perform at their best when they are 15.

    So the most promising way to ensure greater equality may be to make early-years education and care for more widely available and more affordable, as it is in the Nordics. Some governments are already rethinking their educational priorities, shifting some of their spending to the early years.

    Most rich countries decided more than a century ago that free, compulsory education for all children was a worthwhile investment for society. There is now an argument for starting preschool education earlier, as some countries have already done. In the face of crushing new inequalities, a modern version of that approach is worth trying.

72 hours in Beijing

    Traveling to China is no longer a luxury for many foreign passport holders. The Chinese government has permitted a 72-hour visa-free policy that offers access to visitors from 53 countries including the US, France and Austria. Let's start with the capital of China, Beijing Here's a pick of the best in Beijing!

    Mutianyu Great Wall

    Your trip to Beijing isn't really complete without seeing one of the "New Seven Wonders of the World", the Great Wall of China. The Mutianyu section of the Great Wall is by far the most well-preserved of all. Taking a one hour bus ride, Mutianyu would be your ideal location for a half-day of hiking away from the large crowds in the city. Also, the authorities have allowed tourists to paint graffiti on a specific section of the Great Wall since 2014. The Great Wall was designated a UNESCO World Heritage site in 1987.

    798 Art Zone

    This would be on the top of my list! Named after the 798 factory that was built in the 1950s, the art zone is home to various galleries, design studios, art exhibition spaces, fashionable shops and bars. You could easily spend half your day wandering around the complex, feeling the contrast of the present and the past.

    Summer Palace

    Located in northwestern Beijing, the Summer Palace is by far the city's most well-preserved royal park. With its huge lake and hilltop views, the palace offers you a pastoral escape into the landscape of traditional Chinese paintings. The Summer Palace was added to the UNESCO World Heritage List in 1998.

    Sichuan Provincial Restaurant

    While in Beijing, apart from trying the city's best-known Peking duck, the Sichuan provincial restaurant is one of places where you can enjoy regional delicious food. It offers one of China's eight great cuisines, Sichuan, which ranges from Mapo tofu to spicy chicken.

    Have you ever noticed how Americans fill up their entire glass with ice and then pour their beverage (饮品) in, but Europeans take their drinks at room temperature? In the U. S. , we've created fridges that give you cold ice at the press of a button, but in Britain they typically serve their tap water warm.

    This tradition—if that's what you want to call it—dates back to the 19th century. During that time, it was already commonplace for most American homes to have an ice box. Ice would be harvested in northern America or Canada and shipped across the Atlantic and sold at a high price in British department stores. Can you imagine heading to Macy's to treat yourself to a block of ice?

    Putting ice in your drink started to become somewhat of a fashion(时尚)trend for the wealthy in Britain. Some would put a few cubes in their champagne and sip on their chilled drinks at high-class parties. But, like with any fashion trend, it eventually faded, mainly because the ice was just too expensive. And even once ice boxes began appearing in homes in Britain as well, Brits never took a liking to ice in their drinks.

    So, next time you travel overseas, don't feel offended (被冒犯) when your server gives you an eye roll when you ask for ice water.