Failure is probably the most exhausting experience a person ever has. There is nothing more tiring than not succeeding.

We experience this tiredness in two ways: as start-up fatigue(疲惫) and performance fatigue. In the former case, we keep putting off a task because it has either too boring or too difficult. And the longer we delay it, the more tired we feel.

     Such start-up fatigue is very real, even if not actually physical, not something in our muscles and bones. The solution is obvious though perhaps not easy to apply: always handle the most difficult job first.

Years ago, I was asked to write 102 essays on the great ideas of some famous authors. Applying my own rule, I determined to write them in alphabetical(按字母顺序), never letting myself leave out a tough idea. And I always started the day's work with the difficult task of essay-writing. Experience proved that the rule works.

Performance fatigue is more difficult to handle. Though willing to get started, we cannot seem to do the job right. Its difficulties appear so great that, however hard we work, we fail again and again. In such a situation, I work as hard as I can-then let the unconscious take over.

      When planning Encyclopaedia Britannica (《大英百科全书》), I had to create a table of contents based on the topics of its articles. Nothing like this had ever been done before, and day after day I kept coming up with solutions, but none of them worked. My fatigue became almost unbearable.

      One day, mentally exhausted, I wrote down all the reasons why this problem could not be solved. I tried to convince myself that the trouble was with the problem itself, not with me. Relived, I sat back in an easy chair and fell asleep.

An hour later, I woke up suddenly with the solution clearly in mind. In the weeks that followed, the solution which had come up in my unconscious mind provided correct at every step. Though I worked as hard as before, I felt no fatigue. Success was now as exciting as failure had been depressing.

      Human beings, I believe must try to succeed. Success, then, means never feeling tired.

    A popular saying goes, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” However, that's not really true. Words have the power to build us up or tear us down. It doesn't matter if the words come from someone else or ourselves — the positive and negative effects are just as lasting.

    We all talk to ourselves sometimes. We're usually too embarrassed to admit it, though. In fact, we really shouldn't be because more and more experts believe talking to ourselves out loud is a healthy habit.

    This “self-talk” helps us motivate ourselves, remember things, solve problems, and calm ourselves down. Be aware, though, that as much as 77% of self-talk tends to be negative. So in order to stay positive, we should only speak words of encouragement to ourselves. We should also be quick to give ourselves a pat on the back. The next time you finish a project, do well in a test, or finally clean your room, join me in saying “Good job!”

    Often, words come out of our mouths without us thinking about the effect they will have. But we should be aware that our words cause certain responses in others. For example, when returning an item to a store, we might use warm, friendly language during the exchange. And the clerk will probably respond in a similar manner. Or harsh (刻薄的) and critical language will most likely cause the clerk to be defensive.

    Words possess power because of their lasting effects. Many of us regret something we once said. And we remember unkind words said to us! Before speaking, we should always ask ourselves: Is it true? Is it loving? Is it needed? If what we want to say doesn't pass this test, then it's better left unsaid.

    Words possess power: both positive and negative. Those around us receive encouragement when we speak positively. We can offer hope, build self-esteem (自尊) and motivate others to do their best. Negative words destroy all those things. Will we use our words to hurt or to heal? The choice is ours.

    From The 12 Days of Christmas to See You in the Cosmos, these children's books are ideal for holiday giving.

    The 12 Days of Christmas by Greg Pizzoli

    It's a classic Christmas reading material! It's a counting lesson! It's a crazy tale of elephant love. Have you ever wondered how all those calling birds, turtle doves and French hens fit in one room? Pizzoli, a Theodor Seuss Geisel Award winner has your answer. ($ 15.99, ages 3—5) Amazon. com

   Here We Are by Oliver Jeffers

    Yes, this book by the illustrator (插画家) of the great hit “The Day the Crayons Quit” is for kids ages 3—7, but don't let that fool you.     Inspired by the birth of Jeffers1 first child, this is a father's “welcome to the earth” letter to his baby, filled with the heady wonder of parenthood .A great gift for new parents. ($ 19.99. ages 3—7) Amazon. com

    Wishtree by Katherine Applegate, illustrated by Charles Santoso.

     When a towering oak tree learns that she may be cut down, she starts getting extraordinarily involved in the lives of the humans below her, particularly a girl who is being escaped due to her ethnicity (种族). A lovely tale about common ground and the power of community. ($ 16.99, ages 8 —12) Amazon. com

     See You in the Cosmos by Jack Cheng

    Eleven-year-old Alex is too busy trying to communicate with space aliens to worry about his troubled family life. When Alex runs away from home to launch his homemade rocket, he finds himself sidetracked by new friends and hints of a family secret. ($ 16.99, ages 10 and up) Amazon. com

    The Great War Exhibition

    When: Sun 10 Jan, 9:00 am- 6:00 pm

    Mon 11 Jan, 9:00 am- 6:00 pm

    Where: Dominion Museum Building, 15 Buckle Street, Wellington

    Restrictions: All Ages

    Ticket Information: Admission Free

    The journey is rich in personal stories which tell of the great experience of the battlefields and the hardships at home during war-time New Zealand. The visitors will experience the desperate horrors and the victories of the human spirit that were part of the Great War.

    Kaipara Coast Plants & Sculpture Gardens

    When: Sun 10 Jan, 9:00 am- 5:00 pm

    Mon 11 Jan, 9:00 am- 5:00 pm

    Where: 1481 Kaipara Coast Highway (SH16), Auckland

    Restrictions: All Ages

    Ticket Information:

    Adults: $10.00

    Children 5-13 (under 5, free):$ 5.00

    Groups 10: $ 8.00

    Over 60 & Students (with ID): $ 9.00

    Come and enjoy a relaxing art and garden experience. Sculptures are for sale and the display changes completely every 12 months with the new exhibition opening in December each year to give you a fresh experience each time you come.

    Dream Works Animation

    When: Sun 10 Jan, 10:00 am- 6:00 pm

    Mon 11 Jan, 10:00 am- 6:00 pm

    Where: Te Papa, 55 Cable St, Wellington

    Restrictions: All Ages

    Ticket Information:

    Adults: $ 15.00

    Children & Students 3-15 (with Student ID): $ 6.00

    Children under 3: $0.00

    The exhibition features over 400 items, including rare concept drawing, models, interviews, and original artworks. Adults and kids can get creative with real animation tools, and soar above the clouds in the Dragon Flight experience from How to Train Your Dragon.

    Balls, Bullets and Boots

    When: Sun 10 Jan, 9:00 am- 4:30 pm

    Mon 11Jan, 9:00 am- 4:30 pm

    Where: National Army Museum, 1 Hassett Dr, SH1, Waiouru

    Restrictions: All Ages

    Ticket Information: Door Sales Only

    The exhibition explores the impact the cruel reality of war had on colonial sportsmen and their loved ones as they were transplanted from the rugby fields of home to fight.

    When slaves were first brought over from West Africa to the southern parts of America, they brought along with them aspects of their own culture—religion, dance,language, music, and cuisine.A mix of the two cultures eventually appeared.The religious dance of the ring shout turned into modern dances like the Charleston, and tribal chants slowly transformed into sorrowful hymns (圣歌) sung by slaves that described their hardships.

    These soulful accounts by slaves of the severe climate and conditions began to be called “the blues”,which continued in popularity among African Americans after the Civil War.This music increased in popularity into the early 1900s when many black musicians became an important part of the music industry.

    The slaves that had been brought over were from all different regions of West Africa, but they worked together until they gradually formed a common culture.This strengthened the identity of their music that, in the 1950s, eventually led to the beginning of rock and roll.The Beatles, the most influential band of the 1960s, are often determined as the accelerator that resulted in the ideology (意识形态) surrounding music that is still around today.The freedom and individuality associated with that time period brought forth a whole culture surrounding music.It was not just music any more, but a lifestyle.

    Over the decades, music has developed into such a vital part of society and pop culture.Musicians are glorified, with tons of adoring and screaming fans.The modern technology of present day has allowed for a greater gap between the creator of the music and the fans, as well as a widespread commercialization of music.However, criticisms of modern pop music often arise due to its mass production, and now there is a lack of the same soul and quality of naturalness and simplicity in music that was rising in the early 20th century.

    Living and dealing with kids can be a tough job these days, but living and dealing with parents can be even tougher.

    If I have learned anything in my 16 years, it is that communication is very important, both when you disagree and when you get along. With any relationship, you need to let other person know how you are feeling. If you are not able to communicate, you drift apart()疏远). When you are mad at your parents, or anyone else, not talking to them doesn't solve anything.

    Communication begins with the concerns of another. It means that you can't just come home from school, go up to your room and ignore everyone. Even if you just say "Hi", and see how their day was for five minutes, it is better than nothing.

    If you looked up the word "communication" in a dictionary, it would say "the exchange of ideas, the conveyance（表达）of information, correspondence （通信）, means of communication: a letter or a message". To maintain (保持) a good relationship, you must keep communication strong. Let people know how you feel, even if it's just by writing a note.

    When dealing with parents, you always have to make them feel good about how they are doing as a parent. If you are trying to make them see something as you see it, tell them that you'll listen to what they have to say, but ask them politely to listen to you. Yelling or walking away only makes the situation worse.

    This is an example: one night, Sophie went to a street party with her friends. She knew she had to be home by midnight after the fireworks, but she didn't feel she could just ask to go home. That would be rude. After all, they had been nice enough to take her along with them. Needless to say, she was late getting home. Her parents were mad at first, but when Sophie explained why she was late, they weren't as mad and let the incident go. Communication is the key factor here. If Sophie's parents had not been willing to listen, Sophie would have been in a lot of trouble.

    Communication isn't a one-way deal: it goes both ways. Just remember: if you get into a situation like Sophie's, telling the other person how you feel and listening is the key factor to communication.