LEEDS, England—A Leeds University psychology professor is teaching a course to help dozens of Britons forgive their enemies.

    “The hatred we hold within us is a tumor,” Professor Ken Hart said, adding that it can lead to problems such as high blood pressure and heart disease. More than 70 people have become members in Hart's first 20-week workshop in London—a course he says is the first of its kind in the world.

    “These are people who are sick and tired of living with a memory. They realize their bitterness is a poison they think they can pour out, but they end up drinking it themselves,” said Canadian-born Hart.

    The students meet in groups of eight to ten for a two-hour workshop with an adviser every fortnight. The course, ending in July, is expected to get rid of the tumor of hatred in these people. “People have lots of negative attitudes towards forgiveness,” he said, “People confuse forgiveness with forgetting. Forgiveness means changing from a negative attitude to a positive one." Hart and his team have created instructions to provide the training needed.

    “The main idea is to give you guidelines on how to look at various kinds of angers and how they affect you, and how to change your attitudes towards the person you are angry with," said Norman Claringbull, a senior expert on the forgiveness project.

    Hart said he believes forgiveness is a skill that can be taught, as these people “want to get free of the past”.

    This could be Micah Fitz, first spring without football practices. The 14-year-old has been playing since he was 3, but because he's home-schooled, he can't try out for the local team at Patriot High School in Prince William County, Virginia.

    “I can't play this half of the year and my friends are going to be playing five or six times a week,” he said. “They're going to be getting better and stronger playing with kids that are good.”

Micah and his family—along with many other home-schooling families across Virginia—are hoping the Virginia General Assemble will approve a bill this year that would allow kids like him to try out for sports on public school athletic teams. The bill, called the “Tebow bill”, is named after football player Tim Tebow, who was home-schooled but was allowed to play on a high school team before going to the University of Florida, where he led his team to two national championships.

    Many major statewide education organizations said the bill wouldn't be fair to public school students. Ken Tilley, the executive director of the Virginia High School League, said the bill would violate two of the league's most long-standing standards for qualification: enrollment (注册入学) and academic standing.

    Home-school advocates argue that they are required by the law to document academic progress. But many opponents say students always have the option of attending public high school. That might be what Sydney Bowman, a 12-year-old from Luchetts, will do to keep wrestling, although she would prefer to continue to be taught at home. In her case, girls' wrestling teams are rare enough that there aren't many options other than public school.

    But Micah' mom, Terri Fits, a former public school teacher, said that although they support the local schools and love to cheer on the teams, they like the flexibility of home-schooling.

    I've learned that you have to make the choice if you want to get anywhere. If you just let other people decide what is going to happen for you, then all your goals and dreams may never be achieved.

    Everyone always says that studying abroad in college can change your life. I made the decision to experience it for myself during my junior year. I chose to study in the Dominican Republic. As it got closer to the deadline, an advisor told me I had received a scholarship from an alumni (校友) family foundation.

    During my first semester in the country I fell in love. I was becoming bilingual (双语的) but also learning so much about a new culture. I had begun working with a local grassroots organization, taking part in a project supporting an underdeveloped community just outside the city. My main role was to become aware of the issues facing populations such as these and support community education. I was in no way ready to leave this new life. I felt as if I needed more time to get what I wanted.

    As the next semester began, I realized again that I needed to take a chance. I got involved with a local boarding school for girls living in poverty. I first approached the head of the school to volunteer to teach music classes, asking for money from my college church. I could have never predicted the results of this small action. Another volunteer and I were able to put together a benefit (义演) to show off what the students had learned. We invited community members, friends and other students from local universities to support the girls. We also sold art that the students themselves had created to increase the funding (资助) of the arts program. I felt good when I left, knowing that I had laid the foundation for a good cause and bettered the lives of young girls.

    There will always be people that think they know what is best for you, but you ultimately know what you want in life. My time in the Dominican Republic changed my life by giving me the realization of how fortunate I am and the fact that there is always a chance to give back. You have to go after anything and everything you desire or there may be a missed opportunity. My trip to Santo Domingo taught me to take advantage of new possibilities.

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    There's a word of wellness I've loved for years. It's HALT: the idea that if you want to be calm and content, never let yourself get too hungry, angry, lonely or tired. Researchers are increasingly looking more closely at the "L" in "HALT", with one report presented to the American Psychological Association finding that long-term loneliness might be a greater public health risk than obesity.

    Loneliness is a problem with many faces. Some people are alone most of the time—data collected by the United Kingdom found that 200, 000 people over the age of 75 had not had a conversation with a friend or a relative in more than a month. But some people feel lonely even in a crowded room, disconnected from meaningful relationships even though their days are filled with people.

    To me, walking a positive path means walking alongside others—people who lift our spirits, share our values, challenge us to grow and learn and bring us joy. But social satisfaction doesn't come automatically or even easily to too many people. And in our age of individualized electronic devices, social media and text-based communication, it can be harder than ever to feel truly connected to others.

    I was so heartened to read that recently the British Parliament (议会) has created a "Minister for Loneliness" position to promote research, education and principles so as to cure what some researchers call "the loneliness disease". More and more doctors in America are also screening adult patients for loneliness at annual physical examinations, which is another promising sign.

    With proper social support and community participation, loneliness can be prevented from happening. If you are feeling lonely, make a list of your daily routines and ask yourself how you could add more social interactions to each day. Try reaching out for volunteer opportunities, clubs and organizations to join and old friendships to renew. If you are struggling, ask a consultant to help you identify your social obstacles and overcome them.

    Family sizes are shrinking around the world. In many countries, families are having fewer than two children. Smaller families mean many children now grow up with fewer cousins. This is hard to imagine, as I come from a large extended family with 23 first cousins on one side and 25 on the other.

    Sometimes when I can't sleep, I try to name all my relatives. Of course, almost all of those cousins have married and had children and now their children are having children. With extended families growing so large and spreading so far, get-togethers have nearly become a thing of the past.

    One of the last gatherings on my father's side was at the home of a cousin who has a place in the country on top of a hill. A tent was set up, holding long tables creaking(嘎吱作响) under the weight of fried chicken, potato salad and chocolate cake. A fishing hole waited nearby for the kids. Vehicles poured in from every direction, parking on the drive, the grass, wherever they could find a spot. There was talking and laughing and joking and food.

    While such gatherings had grown infrequent, we were all happy to be together. Although some of us had not seen one another since so-and-so's wedding or somebody's father's funeral, most people were still easy to recognize. Three sisters who sat together all had the same beautiful skin their mother had. The cousin with bright blue eyes who raced her horse as a teenager still had bright blue eyes. An older cousin who gave me piano lessons when I was young and naughty seemed to have forgiven me. We share a gene pool of people who work hard and laugh often.

    It was very dark when the last set of taillights disappeared into the night. As we gathered our things, said our goodbyes and prepared to leave, a cousin called to me saying, "Don't forget where you come from." I never could. And I'd never try.