Forgiveness

    To forgive is a virtue, but no one has ever said it is easy. When someone has deeply hurt you, it can be extremely difficult to let go of your hate. However, forgiveness is possible, and it can be surprisingly beneficial to your physical and mental health. People who forgive show less sadness, anger and stress and more hopefulness, according to a recent research.

    {#blank#}1{#/blank#} Try the following steps:

    Calm yourself. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} You can take a couple of breaths and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, or someone you love.

    Don't wait for an apology. Many times the person who hurt you does not intend to apologize. They may have wanted to hurt you or they just don't see things the same way. {#blank#}3{#/blank#} Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean becoming friends again with the person who upset you.

    Take the control away from your offender(冒犯者). Rethinking about your hurt gives power to the person who causes you pain. Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you.

    {#blank#}4{#/blank#} If you understand your offender, you may realize that he or she was acting out of unawareness, fear, and even love. You may want to write a letter to yourself from your offender's point of view.

    Don't forget to forgive yourself. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} But it can rob you of your self-confidence if you don't do it.

A. Why should you forgive?

B. How should you start to forgive?

C. Recognize the benefits of forgiveness.

D. Try to see things from your offender's angle.

E. For some people, forgiving themselves is the biggest challenge.

F. To make your anger die away, try a simple stress-management technique.

G. If you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting an awfully long time.

    They wear the latest fashions with the most up­to­date accessories(配饰)．Yet these are not girls in their teens or twenties but women in their sixties and seventies. A generation which would once only wear old­fashioned clothes is now favouring the same high street looks worn by those half their age.

    Professor Julia Twigg，a social policy expert，said，“Women over 75 are now shopping for clothes more often than they did when they were young in the 1960s.In the 1960s buying a coat for a woman was a serious matter. It was an expensive item that they would purchase only every three or four years—now you can pick one up at the supermarket whenever you wish to. Fashion is a lot cheaper and people get tired of things more quickly.”

    Professor Twigg analysed family expenditure(支出)data and found that while the percentage of spending on clothes and shoes by women had stayed around the same—at 5 or 6 per cent of spending—the amount of clothes bought had risen sharply.

    The professor said.“Clothes are now 70 per cent cheaper than they were in the 1960s because of the huge expansion of production in the Far East. In the 1960s Leeds was the heart of the British fashion industry and that was where most of the clothes came from，but now almost all of our clothes are sourced elsewhere. Everyone is buying more clothes but in general we are not spending more money on them.”

    Angela Barnard，who runs her own fashion business in London，said older women were much more affected by celebrity(名流)style than in previous years.

She said，“When people see stars such as Judi Dench and Helen Mirren looking attractive and fashionable in their sixties，they want to follow them. Older women are much more aware of celebrities. There's also the boom in TV programmes showing people how they can change their look，and many of my older customers do yoga to stay in shape well in their fifties. When I started my business a few years ago，my older customers tended to be very rich，but now they are what I would call ordinary women. My own mother is 61 and she wears the latest fashions in a way she would never have done ten years ago.”

    Computers have beaten human world champions at chess and, earlier this year, the board game Go(围棋). So far, though, they have struggled at the card table. So we challenged one AI(artificial intelligence) to a game.

Why is poker so difficult? Chess and Go are “information complete” games where all players can see all the relevant information. In poker, other players' cards are hidden, making it an “information incomplete” game. Players have to guess opponents' hands from their actions—-tricky for computers. Solving poker could lead to many breakthroughs, from cyber security to driverless cars.

    Scientists believe it is only a matter of time before AI once again vanquishes humans, so our human-machine match comes up in a game of Texas Hold's Em Limit Poker. The AI was developed by Johannes Heinrich, a researcher studying machine learning at UCL. It combines two techniques: neural(神经的)networks and reinforcement learning(强化学习).

    Neural networks, to some degree, copy the structure of human brains: their processors are highly interconnected and work at the same time to solve problems. They are good at spotting patterns in huge amounts of data. Reinforcement learning is when a machine, given a task, carries it out, learning from mistakes it makes. In this case, it means playing poker against itself billions of times to get better.

    Mr Heinrich told Sky News: “Today we are presenting a new procedure that has learned in a different way, more similar to how humans learn. In particular, it is able to learn abstract patterns, represented by its neural network, which allow it to deal with new and unseen situations.”

    After two hours of quite defensive play, from the computer at least, we called it a draw.

    You know the feeling—you have left your phone at home and feel anxious, as if you have lost your connection to the world. "Nomophobia(无手机恐惧感)" affects teenagers and adults alike. You can even do an online test to see if you have it. Last week, researchers from Hong Kong warned that nomophobia is infecting everyone. Their study found that people who use their phones to store, share and access personal memories suffer most. When users were asked to describe how they felt about their phones, words such as "hurt" (neck pain was often reported) and "alone" predicted higher levels of nomophobia.

    "The findings of our study suggest that users regard smartphones as their extended selves and get attached to the devices," said Dr Kim Ki Joon. "People experience feelings of anxiety and unpleasantness when separated from their phones." Meanwhile, an American study shows that smartphones separation can lead to an increase in heart rate and blood pressure.

    So can being without your phone really give you separation anxiety? Professor Mark Griffiths, psychologist and director of the International Gaming Research Unit at Nottingham Trent University, says it is what is on the phone that counts—the social networking that creates Fomo (fear of missing out).

    "We are talking about an Internet-connected device that allows people to deal with lots of aspects of their lives," says Griffiths. "You would have to surgically remove a phone from a teenager because their whole life is ingrained in this device."

    Griffiths thinks attachment theory, where we develop emotional dependency on the phone because it holds details of our lives, is a small part of nomophobia. For "screenagers", it is Fomo that creates the most separation anxiety. If they can't see what's happening on Snapchat or Instagram, they become panic-stricken about not knowing what's going on socially. "But they adapt very quickly if you take them on holiday and there's no Internet," says Griffiths.

    When you're a junior in high school, three little letters quickly become larger than life: SAT.

    At the start of my junior year, I realized that the environment was packed with competition. Surprisingly, this pressure didn't come from adults. It came from the other students. Everyone in my grade had college on the brain. To get into the college of our choice, we all believed, we had to outcompete and outscore everyone else with less sleep, because time for sleeping was time you didn't spend studying for the SAT.

    I let myself get swept up in the pressure. My new motto was, if I wasn't in every single honor level class, I wasn't doing enough. I was bad-tempered and I couldn't focus. I stopped talking to my friends and my mom, and I couldn't figure out who I was. I didn't have the confidence to know that my own passions and unique skills were what would make me stand out to colleges.

That's when I realized: I am not my SAT score. Trying to stick to what I thought colleges wanted masked who I really am. I decided to rely on my strengths and get away from the crazy pressure I was putting on myself.

    Instead of forcing myself into higher levels of math, I took on an extra history class. I learned how to love what I was doing and not what I thought I was supposed to do. I learned to shine as an individual, not a faceless member of the crowd. And I found that not only was this better for my happiness, but it also made me more effective and efficient when I studied.

    To me, individuality means having the confidence to decide who I am and who I want to be, and a number on a page is never going to change that. I am more sure of myself, and more ready to apply for college, than ever.

A new study of fifth and sixth graders in Germany examined the relation between classmates' gender stereotypes (性别刻板印象) and individual students' reading outcomes to explain how these stereotypes contribute to the gender gap in reading.

"It's a cycle of sorts," explains Francesca Muntoni, a researcher at the University of Hamburg, who leads the study. "Reading is first thought as a female advantage." It stresses that girls are born to have an advantage in reading, which in turn greatly affects boys by causing them to devalue their actual reading ability. So finally, it damages their reading motivation (积极性)."

The study has proven that boys are less motivated to read and hold weaker reading-related beliefs about their own skills if they hold the strong stereotype mentioned above. And accordingly, they perform poorly in the reading test. The effect of classmates' stereotypes is seen over and above the effect of individual stereotypes. The study found fewer individual positive effects and no effects of classmates, stereotyping on reading-related outcomes for girls.

The researchers say although their study provides evidence of lasting negative effects of stereotypical beliefs in a classroom context, they need more experimental findings on the subject. They also note that students' gender stereotypes were measured by self-reports, which might limit their accuracy. Finally, they point out that their study did not settle how gender stereotypes were formed.

"To solve socially the determined gender inequality in reading and help create classroom contexts that discourage students from acting on their stereotypical beliefs, teacher and parents may consider educating boys and girls in ways that change stereotypical behaviors. And thus students can become aware of their gender stereotypes to counteract their effects on other students' outcomes and to create a gender-fair learning environment," says Jan Retelsdorf, professor of the University of Hamburg, who co-authored the study.