Ways to create calm in your daily life

    Most of us need some space for calm in our lives. A few simple minutes can create much needed moments of calm.{#blank#}1{#/blank#}You can use these small skills to create calm in your busy schedule.

    Go walking. Walking is perfect and you can do it well anywhere. Simply walking and taking in the view is stress reducing.{#blank#}2{#/blank#} It makes room for new ideas to develop.

    Appreciate nature when we think of nature we think of getting into the countryside or forests, and that is great if you can.{#blank#}3{#/blank#} Actually, nature is everywhere. Find a park or a small patch(小块地)of green, or just stick your head out of the window! You have many ways to appreciate nature.

    Listen to music. Many people listen to music to calm themselves down. Music actually lifts us out of ourselves. It can also draw our attention from boring and tiring things{#blank#}4{#/blank#}.

    {#blank#}5{#/blank#} Certain activities like yoga and tai chi need quiet focus. They are perfect for active calming. They are good for the body, mind and spirit.

    Try out some of these ways and you'll soon be practicing “moments of calm”.

A. Do some activities.

B. But what if you are in the city?

C. Notice the animals around you.

D. It is a time to get stressful thoughts out of your head.

E. Music is a way to express the way that they are feeling.

F. With enjoyable music even work can be “music to your ear”.

G. You don't have to find a mountain to sit on, or empty your mind of all thoughts for hours.

    Sorry seems to be the hardest word. So sang Elton John on one of his biggest 1970s hits——but not every public figure seems to find it so tough to let out that powerful five-letter word.

    In recent months varieties of public figures, from politicians, to Hollywood actors and You Tube stars have all publicly expressed regrets.

    But with floods of regrets on the airwaves, just how can we tell a forced apology from a heartfelt expression?

    In its purest form, saying sorry should be an “act of regrets, a realization that something you have said or done has hurt someone and you want to repair it”, says psychologist Geraldine Joaquim.

    Made early, a sincere apology can be hugely beneficial and can “relieve the tension and takes the wind out of an accusers sails”, she says.

    A need to say sorry can arise in someone's public life and equally at home with their family and friends but, whatever the environment, how well it is received depends on how personalized it feels.

    From businesses, governments and organizations, a scripted response will fail to resonate (引起共鸣) as it will not convey empathy (同理心) and sympathy.

Whether online or in person, the timing and choice of language in an apology are decisive factors.

    “It is important to show that you understand and sympathize,” says Martin Stone, of PR agency Tank, “It is vital that any business or individual making an apology understands the focus- is it sorry for the way it's acted or is it sorry that the complainant feels the way they do?” Performed apologies always have a sense of being “acted out, and are often accompanied by too many theatrical gestures. If sincere, the person making the apology will be looking for listening clues to see if they are being understood, such as eye contact and facial expressions. They will provide “humbling (谦卑的) signals”, such as a lowered head, to indicate regrets.

    It is also important to avoid irresponsible statements or promises that can't be kept. “Don't say that you'll ensure that this will not happen again if you're not confident it won't. It could come back to bite you,” Stone explains.

    Equally, the use of “but” can hugely change the tone of an apology.

    As Stone points out. 'I'm sorry but... It sounds like you are making excuses and aren't actually taking any form of responsibility. It may be three letters but it can instantly make an apology seem hollow,”

Everybody gets angry sometimes. Being angry doesn't really solve much—but what people do when they feel angry is important. The goal is to calm yourself down and try to solve whatever problem is bothering you. This is hard for some kids (and adults too). Instead of calming down, some kids might keep getting more and more upset until they explode like a volcano!

Some kids get angry more often or more easily than some other kids. Their anger might be so strong that the feelings gets out of control and causes them to act in ways that are unacceptable and hurtful. People might say kids like this have a temper, which is a term for acting out of control. Some kids might get so angry that they scream at their mom or dad, hit the wall, close doors violently, break something, or even hit a brother or sister. Kids are allowed to express their feelings, even angry ones, but it's not OK for a kid to do any of those things. Kids don't want to (or mean to) act this way—but sometimes angry feelings can be hard to manage.

【写作内容】

1）以约30个词概括上文的主要内容；2）结合上述信息，简要分析导致孩子发脾气的主要原因；3）提出建议如何控制发脾气（不少于两点）。

【写作要求】

1）写作过程中不得直接引用原文中的句子；

2）作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称；

3）不必写标题。

【评分标准】概括准确，语言规范，内容合适，语篇连贯。

Dealing with Difficult Relationships

    Everyone has at least one awkward or tense relationship. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} It may be with somebody who will use up your energy whenever you are with them. Or worse, it could be someone who always cuts you down. By persuading you it's your obligation or duty, you forget about your own needs. Sadly, by remaining loyal to these people, you forget who you are. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} No matter who they are, it's necessary that you learn to set boundaries (界限) for yourself. It is you who allow them to take advantage of you or even belittle you.

    If you find a relationship unhealthy and it's time for you to set boundaries, the following advice may be helpful.

    Setting boundaries for difficult relationships starts by admitting how you are affected by the relationships. {#blank#}3{#/blank#} For example, it's time to study for tomorrow's test. But your friend wants to take you to a party. Here, setting boundaries will help protect your academic goals. Someone who pressures you to something you're not comfortable doing will stress you out. {#blank#}4{#/blank#}

Next, decide how much time you should spend with these people. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} But it's difficult to help others if you forget to protect your own priority (优先次序).

    Settling boundaries requires taking a long, honest look at yourself. By saying no to harmful patterns in relationships, you say “yes” to a healthier you.

A. Does this kind of relationship lower your self-respect?

B. These people may be your family members or even friends.

C. It's easy to spend too much time and energy offering them help.

D. People may try to keep you in an unhealthy relationship.

E. But a friend who considers how you feel will respect your willingness to try something new.

F. It's not easy to set boundaries because you may be afraid of losing them.

G. Do they bring you closer to your goals or pull you farther away?

    Decades of research has demonstrated how junior employees benefit from being mentored (指导). Guidance from senior colleagues has also been shown to enhance mentees' job performance and satisfaction.{#blank#}1{#/blank#}

    We were especially interested in understanding how mentoring might help mentors who work in stressful occupations. Mental health is a growing concern within occupations that play important social roles, such as medical professionals, firefighters, and police officers. And because policing is one of the most stressful occupations, with high levels of mental health and well-being difficulties, we conducted a study of a formal mentoring program in an English police force.

    {#blank#}2{#/blank#} It was designed to support the development of junior officers by giving them a way to discuss concerns and receive guidance. Our study involved two parts. First, we conducted a field experiment: we compared the mental health of 17 mentor-mentee pairs to a control group of 18 pairs of senior and junior officers that did not participate in the program. Second, we interviewed both the mentees and their mentors separately.

    Our experiment results showed that people who served as mentors experienced lower levels of anxiety, and described their job as more meaningful, than those who did not mentor. We learned from our interviews that mentoring afforded senior officers, as well as junior officers, a chance to discuss and reflect on concerns. {#blank#}3{#/blank#}By acknowledging that these anxieties were common, both mentees and mentors grew more comfortable in discussing them and in sharing different coping mechanisms.

    Why does mentoring have this impact on mentors? {#blank#}4{#/blank#} Despite the pressures that comes with their roles — including abuse, difficult decision making, and the risk of death — police officers tend not to seek support from other officers, including more senior colleagues. This is to avoid negative stigma, a shameful reputation, associated with mental health disorders. Mentoring thereby offered a way to build trust within a relationship that laid a foundation for open and honest communication of sensitive topics.

A. We believe it offers a way to receive support that is often lacking.

B. The mentoring program was launched in 2013 in one of the police forces in England and Wales.

C. Formal mentoring programs provide an opportunity to encourage the discussion of difficult and sensitive topics.

D. However, what we are wondering is why mentoring has such great impact on mentors as well as mentees.

E. Mentors heard their mentees' accounts of anxiety and realized these feelings — which they also shared — were common.

F. We know far less, however, about how mentoring might benefit mentors themselves.

Observational Learning: To See Is to Know

    A group of psychologists, led by Albert Bandura, developed social learning theory, which emphasizes the fact that much learning occurs in a social context. This kind of learning, which results simply from observing and imitating the behavior of others, is called observational learning. Observational learning helps people acquire proper behavior in their families and cultures. By watching others, we learn how to greet people, eat, laugh and tell jokes. Do you still remember your first few days in senior grade one? By watching others, you learned how people talked to each other, what clothes were "fashionable," and how to interact with instructors.

    With modeling, you observe others' behaviors, and then none, some, or all of these behaviors may be learned and repeated, or modified. In one of Bandura's classic studies, children were divided into three groups: One group watched an adult beating up a Bobo doll, one group watched an adult ignoring the Bobo doll, and the third didn't see an adult at all. After being mildly frustrated by being placed in a room with toys, but not being allowed to play with some of them, all of the children were then placed in another room with a variety of toys, including a Bobo doll. Children in the first group tended to imitate what they had seen, mistreating the doll (and inventing new ways to abuse it).

    Researchers have discovered that several characteristics of models can make learning through observation more effective. Not surprisingly, the more you pay attention to the model, the more you learn. You are more likely to pay attention if the model is an expert, is good looking, has high status, or is socially powerful. Second, by watching others, we learn about what behaviors are appropriate for people like ourselves, so models who are seen as similar are more readily imitated. All students need to see successful, capable models who look and sound like them.

    Then, as teachers, how can you apply observational learning? Here are a few guidelines. Above all, model the behaviors and attitudes you desire your students to learn. For example, show enthusiasm for the subject you teach. Be willing to demonstrate both the mental and the physical tasks you expect the students to perform. Second, use peers, especially class leaders, as models. For example, in group work, pair students who do well with those who are having difficulties. Third, you may seek the help of class leaders in modeling behaviors. Examples include letting high­status students lead an activity when you need class cooperation or when students are likely to be reluctant at first.