It is not only praise or punishment that determines a child's level of confidence. There are some other important ways we shape our kids—particularly by giving instructions and commands in a negative or positive choice of words. For example, we can say to a child “Don't run into traffic!” or “Stay on the footpath close to me.” In using the latter, you will be helping your kids to think and act positively, and to feel competent in a wide range of situations, because they know what to do, and aren't scaring themselves about what not to do.

    Why does such a small thing make a difference? It is all in the way the human mind works. What we think, we automatically rehearse. For example, if someone offered you a million dollars not to think of a blue monkey for two minutes, you wouldn't be able to do it. When a child is told “Don't fall off the tree,” he will think of two things: “don't” and “fall off the tree”. That is, he will automatically create the picture of falling off the tree in his mind. A child who is vividly imagining falling off the tree is much more likely to fall off. So it is far better to use “Hold on to the tree carefully.”

    Clear, positive instructions help kids to understand the right way to do things. Kids do not always know how to be safe, or how to react to the warning of the danger in negative words. So parents should make their commands positive. “Sam, hold on firm to the side of the boat” is much more useful than “Don't you dare to fall out of the boat?” or worse still “How do you think I'll feel if you drown?” The changes are small but difference is obvious.

    Children learn how to guide and organize themselves from the way we guide them with our words, so it pays to be positive.

    The principles about applying for jobs have altered greatly lately. In the past, people preferred a hand­written application letter. However, nowadays it is becoming more and more common to apply for a job through the Internet. You can find information on the Internet about how to apply for jobs. Information can be found about how to fulfill your application letter, the clothes that you should wear and how to carry out the interview itself.

    The importance of body language is often mentioned, but doesn't always get the attention it deserves. After all, before a word has even been spoken, your body language will have already given people their first impression of you. Additionally, your body language will also give out a lot more information. Based on your body language it can be seen if you are self-confident. It can also show if you are a busy or a quiet type and it helps give an impression of whether you are speaking truthfully or not. Body language can show how enthusiastic you are and if you are a nice person, someone who will take his work seriously, but also someone who has a sense of humor and can enjoy a joke from time to time. The members of the application committee will ask you questions, but your answers won't only be oral. The committee will not only pay attention to what you say, but also to how you say it! Body language will determine first if it “clicks”， and sometimes all it takes is just a few seconds. Everybody uses body language, but it takes place mostly at a subconscious (下意识的) level. Using body language appropriately, you can definitely increase your chances of getting a job.

    He was the baby with no name. Found and taken from the north Atlantic 6 days after the sinking of the Titanic in 1912, his tiny body so moved the salvage (救援) workers that they called him “our baby.” In their home port of Halifax, Nova Scotia, people collected money for a headstone in front of the baby's grave (墓), carved with the words: “To the memory of an unknown child.” He has rested there ever since.

    But history has a way of uncovering its secrets. On Nov. 5, this year, three members of a family from Finland arrived at Halifax and laid fresh flowers at the grave. “This is our baby,” says Magda Schleifer, 68, a banker. She grew up hearing stories about a great-aunt named Maria Panula,42, who had sailed on the Titanic for America to be reunited with her husband. According to the information Mrs. Schleifer had gathered, Panula gave up her seat on a lifeboat to search for her five children -- including a 13-month-old boy named Eino from whom she had become separated during the final minutes of the crossing. "We thought they were all lost in the sea," says Schleifer.

    Now, using teeth and bone pieces taken from the baby's grave, scientists have compared the DNA from the Unknown Child with those collected from members of five families who lost relatives on the Titanic and never recovered the bodies. The result of the test points only to one possible person: young Eino. Now, the family sees no need for a new grave. "He belongs to the people of Halifax," says Schleifer, "They've taken care of him for 90 years."

    Adapted from People, November 25, 2002

    Attractions in New York

    Empire State Building

    Towering over 444 meters into the sky, the building has an indoor and outdoor observation deck on the 86th and 102nd floor, where you can see the overall view of the New York City. The building houses more than 1000 businesses. You can buy your ticket online in advance to avoid waiting .Telephone ： 212-736-3100 Location ： 350 5th Avenue, New York, NY 10118.

    Open Hours： 08:00-02:00

    Central Park

    For more than 150 years, visitors have come to Central Park's 843 green acres in the heart of Manhattan. Since 1980, the Park has been managed by the Central Park Conservancy, in partnership with the public. You can visit the official website of Central Park to learn more about Park happenings and activities and to learn how to help Central Park Telephone： 212-310-6600

    Location: 59th to 110th Street, Manhattan Borough from Central Park West to 5th Avenue, New York

    City NY 10022

    Open Hours： 06:00-23:00

    The National 9/11 Memorial & Museum

    The National 9/11 Memorial & Museum is a place of remembrance honoring those who lost their lives in the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. The 9/11 Memorial Museum displays Monumental artifacts linked to the events of 9/11, while presenting stories of loss, sympathy and recovery that are central to telling the story of the 2001 attacks and the consequence. It also explores the global impact of 9/11 and its continuing significance.

    Telephone： 212-312-8800

    Location: 180 Greenwich St. World Trade Center New York City, NY 10007

    Open Hours： 09:00-20:00

    The Metropolitan Museum of Art

    At New York City's most visited museum and attraction, you will experience over 5,000 years of art from around the world. The Met is for anyone as a source of inspiration, and understanding. You can learn, escape, play, dream, discover and connect.

    Telephone： 212-535-7710

    Location ： 1000 5th Avenue, New York City, NY 10028-0198 Open Hours： 10:00-17:30

    I start every summer with the best of intentions: to attack one big book from the past, a classic that I was supposed to have read when young and ambitious. Often the pairings of books and settings have been purely unthinking: "Moby Dick" on a three-day cross-country train trip: “The Magic Mountain” in a New England beachside cottage with no locks on the doors, no telephones or televisions in the rooms, and little to do beyond row on the salt pond. Attempting "The Man Without Qualities" on a return to Hawaii, my hometown, however, was less fruitful: I made it through one and a quarter volumes (册), then decided that I'd got the point and went swimming instead.

    But this summer I find myself at a loss. I'm not quite interested in Balzac, say, or “Tristram Shandy.” There's always War and Peace, which I've covered some distance several times, only to get bogged down in the "War" part, set it aside for a while, and realize that I have to start over from the beginning again, having forgotten everyone's name and social rank. How appealing to simply fall back on a favorite once more into “The Waves” or “Justine,” which feels almost like cheating, too exciting and too much fun to properly belong in serious literature.

    And then there's Stendhal's “The Red and the Black,” which happens to be the name of my favorite cocktail of the summer, created by Michael Cecconi at Savoy and BackForty. It is easy to drink, and knocking back three or four seems like such a delightful idea. Cecconi's theory: "I take whatever's fresh at the green market and turn it into liquid." The result is a pure shot of afternoon in the park, making one feel cheerful and peaceful all at once, lying on uncut grass with eyes shut, sun beating through the lids…

    If you have a chance to go to Finland, you will probably be surprised to find how "foolish" the Finnish people are.

    Take the taxi drivers for example. Taxis in Finland are mostly high­class Benz with a fare of two US dollars a kilometer. You can go anywhere in one，tell the driver to drop you at any place，say that you have some business to attend to，and then walk off without paying your fare. The driver would not show the least signs of anxiety.

    The dining rooms in all big hotels not only serve their guests，but also serve outside diners. Hotel guests have their meals free, so they naturally go to the free dining rooms to have their meals. The most they would do to show their good faith is to wave their registration cards to the waiter. With such a loose check，you can easily use any old registration card to take a couple of friends to dine free of charge.

The Finnish workers are paid by the hour. They are very much on their own as soon as they have agreed with the boss at the rate. From then on they just say how many hours they have worked and they will be paid accordingly.

    With so many loopholes(漏洞) in everyday life, surely Finland must be a heaven to those who love to take "petty advantages". But the strange thing is that all the taxi passengers would always come back to pay their fares after they have attended to their business and that not a single outsider has ever been found in the free hotel dining rooms. And workers always give an honest account of the exact hours they put in. As the Finns always act on good faith in everything they do, living in such a society has turned everyone into a real “gentleman”.