Recently I had a conversation in Beijing with an adult Chinese friend who was complaining how difficult it was to study English. No surprises there. It is a difficult language to master, just like Chinese. I made a few suggestions based on my experience. One involved a very valuable fact which I learned from my high school Latin and Greek teacher, Dr. Smith．He is a gifted linguist （语言学家），and has an amazing ability to remember things, like poetry, essays, speeches, etc．His advice to us students is that for memorization purposes, there is forty minutes each day in which our memory is more acceptable than it is during the other 23 hours and 20 minutes.

    This 40-minute "super memory" period is divided into two parts: the 20 minutes before we sleep, and the 20 minutes after we first awake. The theory supporting this is pretty simple. First, the last information we input into our brain before bed has a better chance of taking root than information gained during the noisy daytime; and second, our mind is free of disturbance(干扰) when we first awake in the morning一so more receptive to inputs, like a blank slate（石板）．

    I took the advice to heart and it served me well in my school years. In my university days, our Chinese teacher would assign us 200 new vocabulary words each day, on which we would be quizzed（测试）the following day. Without the "magic" 40-minute technique, there's no way I would have passed those daily quizzes.

    As far as language study goes, it's not only useful for memorizing vocabulary. It's also a very useful window of time to listen to the language we're studying even with background noise, and even if it's at a level we find difficult to understand. It might be audio（声音的）language study, aids, or just radio, TV or whatever.

    Beyond our years of formal(正式的) education, memory skills are hugely important in any career. How many times have we heard a speaker read their speech from a prepared text, or read the word-by-word content of a PowerPoint presentation as they present each slide（投影片）? These are annoying, boring, and less effective ways of communicating. They are almost guaranteed(保证) to lose the audience's close attention and interest, let alone persuade or inspire anyone to do anything. And yet lots of people still make this mistake.

    If we use the 40-minute technique, we may not succeed in memorizing our presentation content on a 100% word-by-word basis, but we'll be familiar enough so that we can spend much more time making eye contact with our audience. We will get them in the process, while looking at our text instead of staring at it. This will also free up our hands and arms to convey some extra messages through gesture．

    As you see, the technique really works, but like many things, it takes practice to perfect it. Therefore, we'd better find ways to use the language outside of the classroom, as regularly and frequently as possible. One basic rule of language learning is, "Use it, or lose it·”

Seize the forty-minute learning window and we'll bring in a rich harvest of language learning.

    Some of the best research on daily experience is rooted in rates of positive and negative interactions, which has proved that being blindly positive or negative can cause others to be frustrated or annoyed or to simply tune out.

    Over the last two decades, scientists have made remarkable predictions simply by watching people interact with one another and then scoring the conversations based on the rate of positive and negative interactions. Researchers have used the findings to predict everything from the likelihood that a couple will divorce to the chances of a work team with high customer satisfaction and productivity levels.

    More recent research helps explain why these brief exchanges matter so much. When you experience negative emotions as a result of criticism or rejection, for example, your body produces higher levels of the stress hormone, which shuts down much of your thinking and activates (激活) conflict and defense mechanisms (机制). You assume that situations are worse than they actually are.

    When you experience a positive interaction, it activates a very different response. Positive exchanges increase your body's production of oxytocin, a feel-good that increases your ability to communicate with, cooperate with and trust others. But the effects of a positive occurrence are less dramatic and lasting than they are for a negative one.

    We need at least three to five positive interactions to outweigh every one negative exchange. Bad moments simply outweigh good ones. Whether you're having a conversation, keep this simple short cut in mind: At least 80 percent of your conversations should be focused on what's going right.

    Workplaces, for example, often see this. During performance reviews, managers routinely spend 80 percent of their time on weaknesses and “areas for improvement”. They spend roughly 20 percent of the time on strengths and positive aspects. Any time you have discussions with a person or group, spend the vast majority of the time talking about what is working, and use the remaining time to address weaknesses.

    I ran into quite a few language problems while vacationing ( 度假) with my family last summer. The most embarrassing was when my Mom apologized to the people we were staying with because her “pants were dirty”. They looked at her in amazement, not knowing how to react. You see, Mom had fallen over and gotten mud on her jeans. But in Britain, “pants” means underpants or knickers( 内裤；衬裤), not trousers as it does back home.

    Katie — From America

    I went to stay with a friend on the west coast last summer. Her flat was on the first floor of a high-rise building so I got the lift up. Then I wandered round for ages looking for her flat but couldn't find it. Fed up and tired, I finally had to go out to find a phone box. She explained that her flat was on the first floor, which for me meant the ground floor.

    David — From Britain

    When I asked for the “restroom” in a big department store, people kept directing me to a room with seats where I could sit and “rest”. It took me years to get through to (使...明白)someone that I only wanted the toilet!

    Tom — From America

    Last summer we went on a two-week family touring holiday, so Dad hired a car over the Internet. This was an old vehicle and there turned out (结果是；证明是)to be lots of things wrong with it. When he phoned the hire company and tried to explain that the lock on the boot was broken, they thought he was talking about footwear! He had no idea their word for “boot” was “trunk”. In the end we went to a garage and just solved the problem.

    Mary — From Britain

    Feeling down? Why not visit one of these four websites?

    Collegehumor.com

    This site was created in 1999 and gets about seven million visitor per month. Two of its videos have been chosen as winners for the Webby Awards: Pixar Intro Parody and Web Site Story. Other funny videos to looks out for include a debate on the advantages and disadvantages of going to college.

    Funnyordie.com

    This site has lots of really funny videos And as the name suggests, users vote on videos, choosing the options “funny” or “die”. If the video receives too many “die” votes, it's sent to the site's “crypt”. But if it gets enough “funny” votes, it goes into the Hall of Fame. The site was created in 2006 by comedians Will Ferrell and Adam McKay. The site's first video. The Landlord has had over 70 million views Videos to watch out for include Just a Tip: Taxi, with some valuable advice on how to catch a taxi, and Over Analyzing Texts, with some tips on how to respond to text messages

    Reddit.com

    Founded in 2005, Reddit.com is a social news and entertainment website. Registered users put funny content in the form of the video link or texts on the website. Other users then vote these things “up” or “down”. The most recent and well-liked content appears at the top on the front page of the site.

    Theonion.com

    First appearing as a satirical newspaper in 1988, Theonion.com has hundred of videos and articles on news and current affairs, and receives an average of 7.5 million visitors a months. It's famous for its amusing items, such as Michelle Obama Seen Outside Walking Family Rhinoceros or Dad Can't Believe Lawn.

    I have a story about raising free-range (自由放养) kids. This past Columbus Day, my husband and I went fishing with some friends on their boat while our10 and 8-year-old kids were in school. We left the house all at the same time, about 7 a. m. My children walked to and from school every day and we knew they would be OK for a couple hours by themselves anyway. We told them to go home after school and we would be home around 4 p. m.

    We live on the Gulf Coast, and since it was a beautiful day, all of the adults decided to go fishing off-shore. At around 2 p. m. after a good harvest from the sea, we started back to the shore and unfortunately after some time, we ran out of gas. We were out of cellphone service, and what was even worse was that 911 wasn't working. We didn't have a radio either. Therefore, we were stuck waiting for someone to pass by. We were out there until 10 p. m. All the while my children were at home, expecting us to return shortly after they got home. At about 7 p. m. , when it was getting dark, my 10-year-old daughter thought something might be wrong so she walked to each house on the street until someone answered the door and asked the person what they should do. This was how we were finally found by the game warden (管理员) on the coast and "rescued".

    Talking with that neighbor the next day, I was never so proud of my children. This neighbour explained to me, "What calmness both of your children showed when explaining the situation and how impressed I was with your children seeking help, even though they didn't know me." I never doubted him for a minute, though next time we go fishing we'll monitor the gas more carefully.

Dear Mary,

How are you? I saw you posted some wonderful photos of the coastline near your hometown. You're really getting into your photography! Right now I'm taking a break to write you an email.

Remember you said you'd like to come over to the UK sometime this year? Well, I was thinking that this year you might like to come to the Edinburgh Festival with me in August. I've got an aunt with a flat in the city center who could put us up.

Do you know much about the festival? It's very famous — the biggest, most popular arts festival in the world! There are lots of things going on — art exhibitions, concerts of all kinds, modern dance, a book festival, etc. The thing it's most famous for is the newest and most exciting theatre. People come from all over the world and perform in their own languages.

In Scotland you have the best of both worlds: culture and wild land. After the festival, we could hire a car and go up to some of the islands off the west coast, like Skye. The weather can be changeable in August, but the landscape is beautiful, with empty beaches and rocky mountains. It's the perfect place for you to take photos. Afterwards, we could head back to the east coast and visit my friend Rob in St. Andrews. It's really pretty and Rob's enjoyable to be with. You'd get on well with him.

So, why don't you have a think about it and then get back to me? Take your time, there's no rush.

Speak to you soon.

Yours,

Sophie