Sometimes when I'm flying from one speaking engagement to another, I find myself sitting next to someone who's quite talkative. This is often a pleasant experience for me because I'm a people-watcher. I learn so much by watching and listening to the people I meet and see every day. I've heard stories of sadness and others of delight, fear and joy, and others that would rival those on “Oprah” and "Geraldo”.

    Sad to say，there are times when I'm sitting next to someone who just wants to vent(发泄） his temper or inflict(强加）his political views on an audience for 600 miles. It was one of those days. I settled in, as my seatmate began his speech on the terrible state of the world with the time worn, “You know, kids today are...” He went on and on, sharing vague notions of the terrible state of teens and young adults, based on watching the six o'clock news rather selectively.

    When I gratefully got off that plane and finally made it to my hotel in Indianapolis, I bought the local paper and went to have dinner in the hotel. There, on an inside page, was an article I believe ought to have been the front-page headline news.

In a little Indiana town, there was a 15-year-old boy with a brain tumor. He was undergoing radiation and chemotherapy(化疗）treatments，As a result of those treatments, he had lost all of his hair. I don't know about you, but I remember how I would have felt about that at his age —I would have felt awkward and ashamed.

    This young man's classmates willingly came to the rescue: all the boys in his grade asked their mothers if they could shave their heads so that Brian wouldn't be the only bald boy in the high school. There, on that page was a photograph of a mother shaving all of her sons' hair with the family looking on approvingly. And in the background, a group of similar bald young men.

    No, I don't despair about kids today.

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    My parents were in a huge argument, and I was really upset about it. I didn't know who I should talk with about how I was feeling. So I asked Mom to allow me to stay the night at my best friend's house. Though I knew I wouldn't tell her about my parents' situation, I was looking forward to getting out of the house. I was in the middle of packing up my things when suddenly the power went out in the neighborhood. Mom came to tell me that I should stay with my grandpa until the power came back on.

    I was really disappointed because I felt that we did not have much to talk about. But I knew he would be frightened alone in the dark. I went to his room and told him that I'd stay with him until the power was restored. He was quite happy and said, “Great opportunity.”

    “What is it?” I asked.

    “To talk, you and I” he said. “To hold a private little meeting about what we're going to do with your mom and dad, and what we're going to do with ourselves now that we're in the situation we are in.”

    “But we can't do anything about it. Grandpa,” I said, surprised that here was someone with whom I could share my feelings and someone who was in the same “boat” as I was.

    And that's how the most unbelievable friendship between my grandfather and me started. Sitting in the dark, we talked about our feelings and fears of life — from how fast things change to how they sometimes don't change fast enough. That night, because the power went out, I found a new friend, with whom I could safely talk about all my fears and pains, whatever they may be. Suddenly, the lights all came back on. “Well,” he said, “I guess that means you'll want to go now. I really like our talk. I hope the power will go out every few nights!”

    Nobody is sure where and when the expression “apple-pie order” began. Some say that Scottish and English writers used the expression a long time ago. Others say it was first used in the northeastern American states known as New England. The housewives of New England cut their apples in even slices. Then they filled pie pans with them in an organized way, row upon row. As one writer said, the women of New England loved to have everything in its place. This perhaps explains why it generally is believed that the expression “apple-pie order” began in New England.

    Another old expression, “apple of discord”, comes from ancient mythology(神话), however. The myth says that all the gods and goddesses were sitting around the table to celebrate the marriage of Thetis and Peleus. One of the goddesses-Discord was a troublemaker. She threw away a golden apple on the table to be given as a prize to the most beautiful goddess.

    At one time, the tomato was called a love apple. That was a mistake. This is how the mistake happened: In the sixteenth century, Spain brought the tomato from South America after Spanish explorers had landed there. Spain then sold the tomato to Morocco. Italian traders carried it on to Italy. The Italian name for the tomato was “pomo di Moro” meant “d'amour” -the French word for love. And so “pomo di Moro” became the apple of love.

    People believe many things about the apple. One belief is that it has great powers of keeping people healthy. A very common expression is "an apple a day keeps the doctor away."

    Another belief is based on fact. The expression is "one rotten apple spoils the barrel." When an apple begins to go bad, it ruins all the other apples around it in the container. The expression has come to mean that one bad person in a group can cause everyone to act bad.

    I am a good mother to three children. I have tried never to let my profession stand in the way of being a good parent. I no longer consider myself the center of the universe. I show up. I listen. I try to laugh. I am a good friend to my husband. I have tried to make marriage vows(誓约) mean what they say. I am a good friend to my friends, and they to me. Without them, there would be nothing to say to you today.

    So here's what I wanted to tell you today: Get a life. A real life, not a desire of the next promotion(提升), the bigger paycheck, the larger house.

    Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure(空闲); it is work. Pick up the phone. Send an email. Write a letter. And realize that life is the best thing and that you have no business taking it for granted.

    It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, and our minutes. It_is_so_easy_to_exist_instead_of_to_live. I learned to live many years ago. Something really bad happened to me, something that changed my life in ways that, if I had my choice, it would never have been changed at all. And what I learned from it is what, today, seems to be the hardest lesson of all I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned to look at all the good in the world and try to give some of it back because I believed in it, completely and totally. And I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned.

    By telling them this: Read in the backyard with the sun on your face. Learn to be happy. And think of life as a deadly illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion(激情) as it ought to be lived.

    The Boy Made It!

    One Sunday, Nicholas, a teenager, went skiing at Sugarloaf Mountain in Maine. In the early afternoon, when he was planning to go home, a fierce snowstorm swept into the area. Unable to see far, he accidentally turned off the path. Before he knew it, Nicholas was lost, all alone! He didn't have food, water, a phone, or other supplies. He was getting colder by the minute.

    Nicholas had no idea where he was. He tried not to panic. He thought about all the survival shows he had watched on TV. It was time to put the tips he had learned to use.

    He decided to stop skiing. There was a better chance of someone finding him if he stayed put. The first thing he did was to find shelter form the freezing wind and snow. If he didn't, his body temperature would get very low, which could quickly kill him.

    Using his skis, Nicholas built a snow cave. He gathered a huge mass of snow and dug out a hole in the middle. Then he piled branches on top of himself, like a blanket, to stay as warm as he could.

    By that evening, Nicholas was really hungry. He ate snow and drank water from a nearby stream so that his body wouldn't lose too much water. Not knowing how much longer he could last, Nicholas did the only thing he could- he huddled(蜷缩) in his cave and slept.

    The next day, Nicholas went out to look for help, but he couldn't find anyone. He followed his tracks and returned to the snow cave, because without shelter, he could die that night. On Tuesday, Nicholas went out to find help. He had walked for about a mile when a volunteer searcher found him. After two days stuck in the snow, Nicholas was saved.

    Nicholas might not have survived this snowstorm had it not been for TV. He had often watched Grylls' survival show. Man vs. Wild. That's where he learned the tips that saved his life, In each episode(一期节目)of Man vs. Wild, Grylls is abandoned in a wild area and has to find his way out.

    When Grylls heard about Nicholas' amazing deeds, he was super impressed that Nicholas had made it since he knew better than anyone how hard Nicholas had to work to stay alive.

    TOASTMASTERS

    Toastmasters is an international organization, designed to develop effective speaking and listening skills. It was set up in 1924 by Ralph Smedley and it's headquartered in California. It has a double purpose: the personal growth and strong effective communication skills.

    Who is Toastmasters open to?

    Many people think Toastmasters is open only to those who wish to be professional speakers, but that is not true. Toastmasters is open to the public at large. Any person who wishes to improve his public speaking is welcome. And also, those who just want to increase their overall self-confidence are encouraged to attend.

How can Toastmasters help you?

    Joining Toastmasters, a person will learn different methods of communicating what he really wants to say, and equally important, he will learn what the audience expects so he can send that message to them in an organized way. Some people are comfortable around friends, but when they appear before a group they don't know, they get nervous. The organization helps its members to get calm and organize thoughts, and express them in an effective way.

    Most often, people assume that when one is listening, he is also paying attention. This is not always true. Many times people are waiting for their turn to speak and are not really listening at all. Toastmasters can develop a person overall in organizing their thoughts, getting information from others and receiving effective feedback（反馈）.

    How does Toastmasters train people?

    Toastmasters has a way of learning by doing. The Toastmasters International Organization provides a menu called the basic menu because it gives a guideline for the development of speeches. These speeches can meet different purposes. For example, one might need voice training; another might be to organize his thoughts or develop use of humor in speeches. There is an eight-week program for young people and also an eight-week speech course offered for adults. As a person continues to give speeches and improve, he progresses from the point of being fearful to stand before a group to the point where he can speak to any group of people with confidence.