Britons may like to complain a lot, but they rarely do so right now, explains BBC writer Ruth Margolis. They would rather grumble (发牢骚) afterward. This is because Britons hate to put someone out and cause any embarrassment. Margolis writes, “For instance, I'm much more comfortable just leaving that piece of raw chicken on my plate instead of complaining to restaurant staff. But beware: if this kind of thing happens when you're dining with an American, they will most likely speak up on your behalf and not understand why you find this ashamed.”

    In a BBC blog post comparing cultural differences between the UK and the US, Margolis mentions a few other things that Americans like to do that are offensive to Britons.

● Not making introductions

    Margolis says most Britons dislike this approach because “talking to strangers without being introduced gives them a stomachache”. Americans rarely introduce a new friend to their friends at parties. Strangers are supposed to introduce themselves.

● “Quite” good

    Using “quite” to mean “very” happens a lot in the US. But if you are invited to a dinner party in Britain, don't describe the meal as “quite good” if you want to express high praise. To Britons' ears, “quite” detracts from the “good”: the meal was OK but could have been better.

● Money Talk

    Americans can talk about money subjects for hours without feeling uncomfortable. For Britons, says Margolis, “Talking about how much we make is unthinkable — even 1ess so than discussing our feelings.”

● Over-politeness

    “It's not that I want shop assistants to be actively rude. But neither do I want to expend energy responding to someone who's been paid to ask: ‘How are you today?'” says Margolis. In the US, it is not unusual to be greeted by a perfect stranger as “honey” or “sweetie”. But Margolis says Britons find put-on friendliness, especially in stores, deeply irritating.

    Killer whales in Alaska's Bering Sea have figured out an easy way to get fed. Instead of seeking out the fish them- selves, the clever whales chase down fishing boats and steal the entire catch of the day, as much as 20,000 to 30,000 pounds.

    Killer whale “thieves” are not a new phenomenon. Japanese fishermen have reported being followed by killer Whales since the 1950s. However, the increasing frequency of whale fish theft in the Bering Sea's continental shelf is now threatening the livelihood of fishermen.

    Paul Clampitt, a local fisherman, says his crew tried to keep the whales away with loud sounds. Though that worked for a short time, the whales now consider the noise “ a dinner bell”. Jay Herbert tried using sonar to keep the whales away. He also met with little success. According to the experienced fisherman, the smart whales deliberately seek out longliners (延绳钓渔船）, and, all the first opportunity presented to them, steal the fish, leaving behind just the lips of the fish caught!

    NOAA Fisheries biologist John Moran is not surprised at the whales' thieving skill. The expert says whales are skilled hunters who can distinguish the sounds of different boats and even recognize the sounds of the operating system that places the fishing equipment into the ocean. The expert jokes, “ Grabbing a fish off a line is nothing.” Since they are social animals, it is easy for whales to pass their skills on to others.

    Killer whales are not the only whale species that have learned to steal from humans. In the Gulf of Alaska, sperm whales also conduct similar thefts. Longline fishermen off Washington, Chile, Australia, Hawaii, and many other countries have reported similar incidents. There is, unfortunately, no easy fix to this problem. One of the possible solutions is using pot traps similar to the ones used to catch crabs. However, the cost of switching from longline to pot fishing is too high, especially for small-scale fisheries. There is also no guarantee that the catch will be safe from the intelligent whales which, many fear, will eventually figure out how to open the pots!

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    Moments before I could lift my case to put it in the plane's overhead locker ahead of our recent holiday to Europe, my father gently urged me to stop. He held the thick handles of the case and lifted it with his thin arms, pushing it into place with a sigh. “You should relax and be the lady, and let me do the heavy tasks,” he said seriously. “In the future, someone special will come into your life and take over such tasks from me, but that will never happen if you do everything yourself.”

    I was stunned into silence. This was not the father I remembered from childhood, who trained me to study hard at school, asked me to earn my own pocket money as a teenager at a local coffee shop, and even taught me household chores so that my life alone in London wouldn't turn into a mess. But then, eight years after I left home and started a new life in the UK, I realized for the first time that my dad still has expectations for me to be like a princess and to stay dependent and delicate, which were considered necessary qualities of women in traditional China.

    Well, that came a little late. Little did Dad know that over the three years of my university life, I moved flats five times all by myself, dragging suitcases of books and clothes, and waiting for the taxi in the rain while holding tight onto cardboard boxes. Meanwhile, living in the UK – a country currently led by a female prime minister – I have never thought there is anything girls cannot do. Most of my female friends are professionals working in the City of London, and after work, we frequently go down to the pub for a drink, just like the guys do – something my mother never did.

    I wondered how I might make Dad understand the new world his little girl has entered. Perhaps one day, he will realize the “someone special” in my life will appreciate my confidence and independence above dependence, and admit that times have changed.

    Get top tips from an expert photographer while you are taking digital photographs in the Garden at Kew.

Event details

    Wednesday 13 – Thursday 14 February, 2019

    Time: 10:30 am – 4 pm

    Place: Kew Gardens

    Course Fee: £160

About the course

    This course is designed for camera-owners who would like to know the basics. It will explain some of the basic principles of photography such as focus and exposure as well as many of the practical aspects such as how to download and store images.

    The great part of the time will be spent practicing techniques by actually using cameras out in the beautiful gardens at Kew. There will be many opportunities to ask questions, review your own images and learn some top tips.

    This course is suitable for people with any sort of camera. It is useful to bring along instructions books, and you'll need to make sure your batteries are fully charged and your memory card has some free space on it.

About the tutor

    Edward Parker is an expert tree and forest photographer who, over the last 20 years, has worked in more than 40 countries around the world. He has written more than 30 educational books and his photographs have been on exhibition at Kew Gardens, Downing Street and the Horniman Museum. Photographing Trees is his latest book.

How to book

    Email adulated@kew.org with a contact number, or call at 020 8332 5641.

    Jim suffered heart problems. In conversation he expressed little joy and it seemed that his life was drawing to a close.

    When his heart problems led to operation, Jim went through it successfully, and a full recovery was expected. Within days, however, his heart was not beating properly. Jim was rushed back to operation, but nothing was found to explain the cause of his illness. He died on the operating table on the day before his 48th birthday.

    Dr. Bruce Smoller, a psychologist(心理学家), had had many conversations with him, and the more he learned, the stranger he realized Jim's case was. When Jim was a child, his father, a teacher, suffered a heart attack and stayed home to recover. One morning Jim asked his father to look over his homework, promising to come home from school at noon to pick it up. His father agreed, but when Jim returned his father had died. Jim's father was 48.

    "I think all his life Jim believed he killed his father," Dr. Smoller says. "He felt that if he had not asked him to look at his homework, his father would have lived. Jim had been troubled by the idea. The operation was the trial(判决) he had expected for forty years." Smoller believes that Jim willed himself not to live to the age of 48.

    Jim's case shows the powerful role that attitude(态度) plays in physical health, and that childhood experiences produce far-reaching effect on the health of grown-ups. Although most cases are less direct than Jim's, studies show that childhood events, besides genes, may well cause such midlife diseases as cancer, heart disease and mental illness.