阅读理解
English
is the most widely used language in the history of our planet. One in every
seven human beings can speak it. More than half of the world's books and three
quarters of international mail are in English. Of all languages, English has
the largest vocabulary — perhaps as many as two million words.
However,
let's face it: English is a crazy language. There is no egg in an eggplant,
neither pine nor apple in a pineapple and no ham in a hamburger. Sweet-meats
are candy, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We
take English for granted. But when we explore its paradoxes (探讨它的矛盾), we find that quicksand can work
slowly, boxing rings are square, public bathrooms have no baths in them.
And
why is it that a writer writes, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce,
and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of
booth be beeth? One goose, two geese — so one moose, two meese?
How
can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy
are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and
quite a few are alike? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as
hell the next?
English
was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects (反映) the creativity of human beings. That's
why, when stars are out, they are visible (能看见的); but when the lights are out, they
are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it; but when I wind
up this essay, I end it.