Human brains begin growing and developing at a very young age. They learn from the simplest experiences, which enable your children to be aware of the world. There's no denying that outdoor play helps a lot!

Times when children have to wait for their turns on playground equipment and following the playground rules by sharing, all these form components of a healthy social-emotional development. Young children develop their social-emotional skills through practice and small steps over time.

As parents or caregivers, it is fairly simple to support your child's social-emotional skills. Acts like holding him, touching him, and speaking to him and giving him loving care and attention are all helping factors. When you allow them freedom to play, it is important to follow their interests in helping build their social-emotional skills.

Difficulties in social-emotional skills can often lead to children having trouble when playing with other children. Becoming easily angry or not empathizing (理解) with other children are all signs that may point in this direction. This can in turn lead to them not empathizing with the needs of other children.

    As for the development of cognitive (认知的) skills, these develop through practice and opportunity over time. And while some cognitive skills may be genetic, most are learned through real life situations. In other words, learning and thinking skills can be improved through experiences.

    To enable them to learn, it is important that we are mindful of what our children are interested in. And this realization is only set in place once the child is given enough room and time to grow and explore.

    Depriving children of such experiences can mean that they might struggle with higher- level thinking skills. And while it is normal to keep them safe, we forget that by rushing them and cutting down on play time, we're actually causing more harm than good.

    A few years ago, I took a sightseeing trip to Washington, DC. I saw many of our nation's treasures, and I also saw a lot of citizens on the street—unfortunate ones, like beggars and homeless folks.

    Standing outside the Ronald Reagan Center, I heard a voice ask. “Can you help me?” When I turned around, I saw an old blind woman with her hand extended. In a natural reflex (自然反射), I reached into my pocket, pulled out all of my loose change and placed it in her hand without even looking at her. I hated being disturbed by a beggar.

But the blind woman smiled and said: “I don't want your money. I just need help finding the post office.” In an instant, I realized what I had done. I had acted with prejudice (偏见)—I had judged another person simply for what I thought she had to be.

    I hated what I saw in myself. This incident brought back my central belief. It reminded me that I believed in being humble (卑下的), even though I'd lost that belief for a moment.

    The thing I had forgotten about myself is that I am an immigrant (移民). I left Honduras and arrived in the US at the age of 15. I started my new life with two suitcases, my brother, my sister and a strong mother. Through the years, I have been a dish washer, roofer, mechanic, cashier and pizza delivery driver, among many other humble jobs. Eventually, I became a network engineer.

In my own life, I have experienced many acts of prejudice. I remember a time at age 17—I was busboy (餐馆工), and I heard a father tell his little boy that if he did not do well in school, he would end up like me. I have also seen the same treatment of family and friends, so I know what it's like, and I should have known better.

    But now, living my American middle-class lifestyle, it is too easy to forget my past, to forget who I am and where I have been, and to lose sight of where I want to go. The blind woman cured me of my blindness. She reminded me of my belief in being humble, and to always keep my eyes and heart open.

    By the way, I helped that lady to the post office. And in writing this essay, I hope to thank her for the priceless lesson she gave me.

    Climbing Without Ropes

    The popular image of the mountain climber is of a person carefully climbing a steep cliff with a network of safety ropes, but it is not the only kind. Many climbers now enjoy bouldering. It's more accessible and better for the environment.

    Here is an example of a climber addressing a bouldering problem.

    Figure 1: The climber has two routes she could take, one to the left and one to the right. The left one appears easier because it has a jug within easy reach, but look what happens if she chooses that direction. She gets stuck on the rock and has to go back down. Sometimes that is even more difficult than going up.

    Figure 2: The climber takes the one to the right this time. Using a foothold and placing her right hand in a crimp, she is able to lift herself up and locate other handholds. After only a few moves, she is able to throw her leg over the top of the boulder and pull herself up.

    Grandparents Answer a Call

    As a third-generation native of Brownsville, Texas, Mildred Garza never planned to move away. Even when her daughter and son asked her to move to San Antonio to help with their children, she politely refused. Only after a year of friendly discussion did Ms. Garza finally say yes. That was four years ago. Today all three generations regard the move as a success, giving them a closer relationship than they would have had in separate cities.

    No statistics show the number of grandparents like Garza who are moving closer to adult children and grandchildren. Yet there is evidence (证据) suggesting that the trend (趋势) is growing. Even President Obama's mother-in-law, Marian Robinson, has agreed to leave Chicago and move into the White House to help care for her granddaughters. According to a study by grandparents.com, 83 percent of the people said Mrs. Robinson's decision will influence grandparents in the American family. Two-thirds believe more families will follow the example of Obama's family.

    “In the 1960s we were all a little wild and couldn't get away from home far enough or fast enough to prove we could do it on our own,” says Christine Crosby, publisher of Grand, a magazine for grandparents. “We now realize how important family is and how important it is to be near them, especially when you're raising children.”

    Moving is not for everyone. Almost every grandparent wants to be with his or her grandchildren and is willing to make sacrifices (牺牲), but sometimes it is wiser to say no and visit frequently instead. Having your grandchildren far away is hard, especially knowing your adult child is struggling, but giving up the life you know may be harder.

    Some students prefer a part-time job after class to earn some money and improve themselves. Here are some good companies:

    IN-N-Out Burger

    It is the best hamburger shop in the west of America. Regarded as one of the best employers, it offers flexible hours and the highest part-time salaries(薪水). Above all, the company treats its employees the way they would like to be treated like family. However, there is no discount offered to its employees.

    Position: selling assistant (experience required)

    Website: www.in-n-out.cm

    Starbucks Coffee

    Starbucks has been at the forefront(前沿) of the United States' coffee revolution. Working hours are flexible. Fit twenty hours of work into your week. There is also a 30% discount and a free pound of coffee or box of tea every week.

    Position: assistant coffee taster(experience required)

    Website: www.Starbucks.Com

    Whole Foods Market

    Whole Foods Market is the world's largest natural and organic food selling company. With its focus on organic ingredients, Whole Foods Market is all about health. Working hours are flexible. Benefits include paid-time off and a 20% discount so you can eat like a king or at least like a top chef in training. There are also training courses on health and food every week.

    Position: secretary

    Website: wwww.wholefoodsmarket.com.

    Lands' End

    Lands' End is a Wisconsin-based clothes store that focuses on casual comfort and warmth for the great outdoors. Employees(even part-time employees) have the chance to go to a company-owned entertainment centre and get a 25% discount on theme parks and movies, and an invitation to the yearly company picnic. Besides, for part-time employees, working hours are flexible and they can come to work anytime they like as long as they work for 4 hours a day.

    Position: salesperson

    Website: www.landsend.com

    Convincing someone to change their mind is really the process of convincing them to change their tribe (部落). If they abandon their beliefs, they run the risk of losing social ties. You can't expect someone to change their mind if you take away their community too.

    The way to change people's minds is to become friends with them, to combine them into your tribe, to bring them into your circle. Now, they can change their beliefs without the risk of being abandoned socially.

    The British philosopher Alain de Botton suggests that we simply share meals with those who disagree with us: "Sitting down at a table with a group of strangers has the incomparable and odd benefit of making it a little more difficult to hate them without punishment. Prejudice and conflict between groups of people from different nations or races feed off abstraction. However, during a meal, something about handing dishes around, unfolding napkins (餐巾纸) at the same moment, even asking a stranger to pass the salt makes us less likely to hold the belief that the outsiders who wear unusual clothes and speak in distinctive accents deserve to be sent home or attacked. For all the large-scale political solutions which have been proposed to ease racial or cultural conflict, there are few more effective ways to promote tolerance between suspicious neighbours than to force them to eat supper together."

    Perhaps it is not difference, but distance that produces tribalism and unfriendliness. As proximity increases, so does understanding. I am reminded of Abraham Lincoln's quote, "I don't like that man. I must get to know him better." Facts don't change our minds. Friendship does.

    The Japanese writer Haruki Murakami once wrote, "Always remember that to argue, and win, is to break down the reality of the person you are arguing against. It is painful to lose your reality, so be kind, even if you are right."

    When we are in the moment, we can easily forget that the goal is to connect with the other side, cooperate with them, befriend them, and integrate them into our tribe. We are so caught up in winning that we forget about connecting. It's easy to spend your energy labeling people rather than working with them.

    The word "kind (family and relatives)" originated from the word "kin (old fashion of family and relatives)." When you are kind to someone, it means you are treating them like family. This, I think, is a good method for actually changing someone's mind. Develop a friendship. Share a meal. Gift a book. Be kind first, be right later.