My friend's grandfather came to America from a farm in Thailand. After arriving in New York, he went into a cafeteria(自助餐厅) in Manhattan to get something to eat. He sat down at an empty table and waited for someone to take his order. Of course nobody did. Finally, a woman with a big plate full of food came up to him. She sat down opposite him and told him how a cafeteria worked.

    “Start out at that end,” she said, “Just go along the line and choose what you want. At the other end they'll tell you how much you have to pay.”

    “I soon learned that's how everything works in America,” the grandfather told my friend later, “Life's a cafeteria here. You can get anything you want as long as you want to pay the price. You can even get success, but you'll never get it if you wait for someone to bring it to you. You have to get up and get it yourself.”

    America is a mobile society. Friendships between Americans can be close and real, yet disappear soon if situations change. Neither side feels hurt by this. Both may exchange Christmas greetings for a year or two, perhaps a few letters for a while — then no more. If the same two people meet again by chance, even years later, they pick up the friendship. This can be quite difficult for us Chinese to understand, because friendships between us flower more slowly but then may become lifelong feelings, extending (延伸) sometimes deeply into both families.

    Americans are ready to receive us foreigners at their homes, share their holidays, and their home life. They will enjoy welcoming us and be pleased if we accept their hospitality (好客) easily.

    Another difficult point for us Chinese to understand Americans is that although they include us warmly in their personal everyday lives, they don't show their politeness to us if it requires a great deal of time. This is usually the opposite of the practice in our country where we may be generous with our time. Sometimes, we, as hosts, will appear at airports even in the middle of the night to meet a friend. We may take days off to act as guides to our foreign friends. The Americans, however, express their welcome usually at homes, but truly can not manage the time to do a great deal with a visitor outside their daily routine. They will probably expect us to get ourselves from the airport to our own hotel by bus. And they expect that we will phone them from there. Once we arrive at their homes, the welcome will be full, warm and real. We will find ourselves treated hospitably.

    For the Americans, it is often considered friendly to invite a friend to their homes than to go to restaurants, except for purely business matters. So accept their hospitality at home!

    Marathon fever is sweeping this country. In recent years, China's ever-growing passion for marathons has been triggered by its economic development and health-conscious middle class. A large number of marathon runners are white-collar workers, civil servants and business people that are keen on leading a healthy lifestyle. Government support, social participation and strong marketing by the sports industry have gradually led to the rapid development of the marathon industry, which is currently valued at 70 billion yuan ($10. 77 billion). Due to its large participation and nationwide media report, marathons are considered by local governments an important part of marketing their cities. Thus, many cities list unique routes across local scenic spots and historical attractions, not only to boost people's fitness, but also to promote local tourism.

    For many runners, marathons are a way of life." As we get older, the places and opportunities to meet new people decrease. I find that participating in marathons is a simple way to make friends," said Wu, who made many friends in the Xstop Running Community, a running club with 48, 000 members established by Xtep, one of the leading distributors of sports merchandise in China.

    "The sense of belonging and the mutual encouragement that exists within the running community are very attractive to many people. We easily befriend one another, since we have the same goal: to keep running and never stop," Wu said. Besides, a marathon can be a great way to explore new places. For a runner who also loves traveling, marathons are a solid choice. "Competing in an international marathon is a chance to experience a city or a country you've never visited before," said Meng, an experienced runner from north China's Tianjin Municipality, who often runs in London, New York and Melbourne.

    There's a unique perspective that people get running through the streets of a city, distinct ancient buildings or amazing natural settings, he explained, things that somehow just can't be seen by rushing in a car. In addition, during a race, streets are often closed off so you don't have to battle traffic.

    "Mummy, I don't know what to play with." Steve interrupts his mother, who is talking to a friend, for the fourth time. "You've got a room full of toys!" his mother says, impatiently. In fact it is the jumble of toys which is to blame for four-year-old Steve's lack of interest in his dolls, cars and stuffed (packed) animals. Each morning he tips out three washing baskets of toys all over his floor, listlessly pulls out something and shortly after is standing at his mother's desk or following her into the kitchen saying: "Mummy, I am bored."

    A family therapist (心理医生) explains why children lose interest when they have a whole "toy shop" at home: "According to their brain development, little children are not in a position to judge the quality of a variety of things at once. There is always just one favorite toy for the moment. All the rest is left lying about." What can parents do to stop their children from being oversupplied with toys? Under no conditions simply make something disappear without the child's knowledge. If he/she takes no more notice of a toy, a parent can ask if it can be stored or given away. Be warned though the child will always say he/she wants it then! A talk with relatives and friends may also help. Lyn is the mother of four-year-old Jessie, and we like her way. A small set of shelves in her child's room holds the toys and books that are the current (at present) favorites. When it seems to her that her daughter is tired of these toys, they put them away in a box together and select some other toys from a cupboard in another room. The box of "old" toys goes into the cupboard. When her child says she is "bored", they also get something from her cupboard - it may be something she has had for some time but because she hasn't seen it for a while it is almost like a new toy.

    Some favorite toys stay out all the time, and there is collection of dolls which sits in the corner, but in this way Lyn has found that she has fewer toys to put away at the end of the day and her daughter always has something "fresh" to play with.

    In today's society, language plays a key role in defining gender (性别) by vocabulary, and also their non-verbal (非语言的) vocabulary. Each one of these different types of ways of communicating is obviously different between men and women.

    Many different studies show that men tend to talk much more than women. It has also been proven that women tend to speak faster than men; this is due to the fact that women tend to be interrupted more often than men are, and also have the ability to speak more clearly, precisely, and more quickly than men. In one study it was found that women spoke for an average of three minutes describing a painting, as opposed to the thirteen-minute average it took men to describe it.

    Men and women also tend to have a very different non-verbal way of communicating, which can also make it very hard for one another to understand what the opposite sex is trying to say. Men's body language is much more reserved when talking to women. Men tend not to make as much eye contact and they generally stay farther away from women when talking to them. Men avoid other people's body space while talking, and they also tend to sit back when talking. All of these have given off the impression of disinterest or boredom. Women are by far better listeners and much more enjoyable to talk with and they tend to raise more topics for conversation.

    Women also make it clearer whether or not the conversation is going somewhere or just stuck in neutral. After learning about our styles of communicating with each other, I have decided that although men have not quite mastered communicating, what fun would it be if we all spoke the same "language"? The little games men and women play with each other while conversing would be lost. The question everyone asks himself or herself after talking with someone of the opposite sex, "I wonder if there's something there?" would no longer exist.