There are good reasons to value our friendships.Some years ago a public-opinion research firm,Roper Starch Worldwide,asked 2007 people to name one or two things that said the most about themselves.Friends far outranked homes jobs, clothes and cars.

    “Ironically,” says Brant R.Burleson, professor of communication at Purdue University in West Lafayette, Ind., “the better friends you are, the more likely you'll face conflicts.” And the outcome can be what you don't want—an end to the relationship.

    The good news is that most troubled friendships can be mended.

    Swallow your pride. It wasn't easy, but that's what Denise Moreland of Hickam Air Force Base in Hawaii did when a friendship turned sour.For nearly four months,Moreland,45,had watched over Nora Huizenga's two young daughters, who were living with their father on the base,while Huizenga,40,completed training as a dental hygienist in Nevada.“I felt honored to be asked to step in,” Moreland says.

    “When Huizenga returned at Christmas,” Moreland recalls,“I had so much to tell her, but she never called.”

    One daughter had a birthday party, but Moreland wasn't invited. “I felt like I'd been used,” she says.At first, Moreland swore to avoid Huizenga.Then she decided to swallow her pride and let her friend know how she felt. Huizenga admitted that she'd been so worried about being separated from her family that she'd been blind to what her friend had done to help her. Today she says, “I would never have figured out what happened if Denise hadn't called me on it.”

    When a friend hurts you, your instinct is to protect yourself.But that makes it harder to solve problems,explains William Wilmot,author of Relational Communication.“Most of us are relieved when differences are brought out in the open.”

    Apologize when you're wrong—even if you've also been wronged.But over the course of a friendship, even the best people make mistakes. “We don't think clearly when we're arguing,” says Michael Lang,a professional mediator (调解人) in Pittsburgh. Instead, says Lang, ask: “What's going on? This doesn't make sense.”

    See things from your friend's point of view. Sociologists Rebecca Adams Rosemary and Blieszner interviewed 53 adults who each had many friendships lasting decades. “We were curious how these people managed to sustain strong friendships for so long,” says Blieszner. Tolerance is key, the researchers learned.” It's surprising how often a dispute results from a simple misunderstanding,” adds psychotherapist Anne Frenkel.

    Accept that friendships change. “Friendships change as our needs and lifestyles change,” Wilmot observes.

    Making friends can sometimes seem easy,says Yager.The hard part is keeping the connections strong during the natural ups and downs that affect all relationships.Her suggestion: Consider friendship an honor and a gift,and worth the effort to treasure and nurture.

    Many of us invest valuable time，energy and money planning our vacations. We do this because we know for sure that going on vacations must be good for us. Research proves this feeling without a doubt. Vacations help us perform better at work, improve our sleep quality and cushion us against depression.

    Yet, despite these benefits, many of us return home with a feeling that our last vacation was OK - but not great. In order to change this, some mistakes should be avoided. A classic one for vacation planners is attempting to maximize value for money by planning trips that have too many components (组成部分)• Perhaps you're planning a trip to Europe, seven cities in 10 days，and you realize it will cost only a little more to add two more destinations to the list Sounds fine in theory, but hopping from one place to the next hardly gives an opportunity to experience what psychologists call mindfulness - time to take in our new surroundings, time to be present and absorb our travel experiences. Another mistake is that we worry too much about strategic issues such as how to find a good flight deal，how to get from A to B，or which destinations to add or subtract from our journey. These issues may seem important, but our psychological state of mind is far more important.

    Actually, vacation happiness is based on the following top rules. First, choose your travel companions wisely, because nothing contributes more significantly to a trip than the right companions. Second，don't spend your vacation time in a place where everything is too expensive so as to maintain a positive mood. Third, shop wisely, for meaningful experiences provide more long-term happiness than physical possessions.

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The Value of Tears

    Tears can ruin make-up, bring conversation to a stop, and give you a runny nose．Tears leave you embarrassed and without energy．Still, crying is a fact of life, and your tears are very useful．Even when you're not crying, they make a film over the eye's surface{#blank#}1{#/blank#}

    When tears fall, they reduce stress．But we tend to fight them for all! sorts of reasons． "People worry about showing their emotions , afraid that once they lose control they'll never get it back{#blank#}2{#/blank#}After we cry, the feelings that caused the tears often disappear．

    Sometimes people become much stressed and can't cry. Whatever emotion they are feeling—shock, anger, fear, or sadness—is being held back．

But everyone has the need to cry. Psychologist Vera Diamond explains that her treatment often consists of giving people permission to cry{#blank#}3{#/blank#} Patients practice crying just to become used to expressing emotions．She suggests safe, private places to cry, like under the bedcovers or in the car．Crying is a way of reducing tension, but people don't like it when others cry because it makes them tense{#blank#}4{#/blank#} And they'll do just about anything to make you stop．

    In certain situations, such as at work, tears are not appropriate．It's good not to cry during a tense business discussion{#blank#}5{#/blank#}You should also act out the whole situation again and be as noisy and angry as you like．It will help you feel better． "And," she adds, "Once your tears have taken away the stress, you can begin to think calmly of ways to deal with the problem．"

    Tears are a sign of our ability to feel．If you find yourself near someone crying, deal with it．And never be afraid to cry yourself．

A．She gives crying exercises．

B．They cry for different reasons．

C．They too may be holding back a need to cry．

D．The fact is that no emotion lasts forever．

E．It contains a chemical against infection.

F．But once you're safely behind closed doors, don't just cry．

G．It forms in response to the stress on the surface of the eye．

    There was once a lonely girl who longed so much for love. One day while she was walking in the woods she found two starving birds. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} She cared them with love and the birds grew strong. Every morning they greeted her with a wonderful song. The girl felt the great love from the birds.

    {#blank#}2{#/blank#} The larger and stronger of the two birds flew from the cage. The girl was so frightened that he would fly away. As he flew close, she grasped him wildly. Her heart felt glad at her success in capturing him. {#blank#}3{#/blank#} She opened her hand and stared in horror at the dead bird. Her desperate love had killed him.

    She noticed the other bird moving back and forth on the edge of the cage. She could feel his great need for freedom. He needed to fly into the clear, blue sky. {#blank#}4{#/blank#} The bird circled once, twice, three times.

    The girl watched delightedly at the bird's enjoyment. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} She wanted the bird to be happy. Suddenly the bird flew closer and landed softly on her shoulder. It sang the sweetest songs that she had ever heard.

    The fastest way to lose love is to hold on it too tight, while the best way to keep love is to give it wings!

A. Her heart was no longer concerned with her loss.

B. Suddenly she felt the bird go softly.

C. She took them home and put them in a small cage.

D. She gave them some delicious food and left.

E. She lifted him from the cage and threw him softly into the air.

F. One day the girl left the door of the cage open.

G. One day she left with the two birds at home alone.

    Today, in most of the theatres in Britain, the stages are situated behind a sort of arch (拱门), called the proscenium (幕布前的舞台部分)arch. The arch runs across the building with the stage on one side of it and the auditorium, housing the audience, on the other. The audience is kept to the area from which it can get a clear view of the stage. This type of theatre has been is use for three hundred years. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} The actor can ignore them until the end, when they applaud the performance. If an actor wants to speak to the audience he tends to step out of the picture, as it were—down to the edge of the stage.

    {#blank#}2{#/blank#} Stage furniture or properties—"props", as they are referred to in the business – are now as few as possible. Elaborate scenery is used only when it is going to last throughout the play, or when it is so constructed that it can be changed quickly. Modern theatres are built with the stage extending far in front of the proscenium arch, if indeed they have a proscenium arch at all, electricity, already long in use, has recently had a revolutionary effect. A change of lighting is as good as a change of scenery, and simpler and quicker; it can light one part of the stage in place of another. Footlights have been found unnecessary. Curtains also are hardly necessary, since the stage can be darkened to signify the end of a scene.

    The modern idea of having the stage in front of the proscenium arch is not really modern, of course. It makes our stages much like Shakespeare's. {#blank#}3{#/blank#} The famous speeches of Hamlet, for instance, can be delivered more quietly and naturally than they were in the las century. The actors no longer have to worry much about not being heard, or about turning their backs to the auditorium. They can get closer to the audience, while a larger audience can see them at work.

    Moreover, nowadays, people are finding that modern theatres are built to sit in comfortably for two or three hours at a stretch. {#blank#}4{#/blank#} The result of these improvements is that, in spite of the high price of seats, perhaps more people than ever before are keen on theatre-going.

A. Over the last few decades, since the Second World War, theatrical customs have altered.

B. It makes people feel, as they watch a play or a show, that they are seeing a living and moving picture.

C. All these innovations have quickened up the pace of the drama.

D. This is an advantage both for actors and audience.

E. Today the theatres are much more comfortable because of the many improvements.

F. Often they can meet and eat in the restaurants attached to the theatres.

    On an average day most of us check our smartphones 47 times, and this habit clouds our judgment on what information to select and store, which might explain why it's time we should do things about the information we take in to form memories.

    As simple as it sounds, the repetition of tasks-reading, or saying words over and over — continues to be the best method for transforming short-term memories into long-term ones. To do that, we have to retrain our minds to focus on one task at a time. Sadly, most turn a blind eye to this formula because we believe we're productive. New connections are made in your brain when you learn, so to remember what you learn, do what you probably did in your youth: Repeat words, thoughts and ideas over and over until you get them right.

    Also, spaced repetition might be the best way. Quickly pushing facts into our brains leads us to forget them in the long term. When you review knowledge and practice it often, it sticks, a research has shown. So if you can include what you're trying to remember into daily life, ideally over time, your chances of keeping it significantly improve. But once you stop reviewing that knowledge, the retention (保留) drops greatly. To get past it, space out your repetition over a few days and test the effect yourself. But be careful: find a healthy interval that works. This is a good way to effectively start tackling a new language.

    Sometimes, memory and focus usually go hand-in-hand. Dr. Cowan suggests rearranging our office setup as one way to improve focus. "The rebirth of the open workplace cannot be helping stay on task, "Dr. Cowan said. Referring to work spaces without desks, physical barriers and privacy, but with a lot of playthings.

    Multiple studies have found that procrastination (拖延) leads to stress and completely kills focus. Stop engaging in useless tasks like surfing the web and just handle whatever it is you need to work on. Then watch your focus increase quickly and your memory improve.

    Memory is very cue (提示) dependent, "Mr. Schacter, a psychologist, said, referring to. Something he calls absent-minded memory failure. "Most say it could never happen to me, but it's a very long list of responsible people that it has happened to. When you don't have that cue, you can forget almost everything. "

    A simple way around that is to set reminders. Even better, combine a few of these techniques: Write your reminder on a post-it and put it on your desk so you're forced to repeatedly look at it over a long period, including the practice of spaced repetition.