Make Up Your Mind to Succeed

    Kind-hearted parents have unknowingly left their children defenseless against failure. The generation born between 1980 and 2001 grew up playing sports where scores and performance were played down because “everyone's a winner.” And their report cards sounded more positive  than ever before. As a result, Stanford University professor Carol Dweck, PhD, calls them “the overpraised generation.”

    Dweck has been studying how people deal with failure for 40 years. Her research has led her to find out two clearly different mind-sets that have a great effect on how we react to it. Here's how they work:

    A fixed mind-set is grounded in the belief that talent is genetic – you're a born artist, point guard, or numbers person. The fixed mind-set believes it's sure to succeed without much effort and regards failure as personal shame. When things get difficult, it's quick to blame, lie, and even stay away from future difficulties.

    On the other hand, a growth mind-set believes that no talent is entirely heaven-sent and that effort and learning make everything possible. Because the ego (自尊) isn't on the line as much, the growth mind-set sees failure as a chance rather than shame. When faced with a difficulty, it's quick to rethink, change and try again. In fact, it enjoys this experience.

    We are all born with growth mind-sets. (Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to live in the world.) But parents, teachers, and instructors often push us into fixed mind-sets by encouraging certain actions and misdirecting praise. Dweck's book, Mind-set: The New Psychology of Success, and online instructional program explain this in depth. But she says there are many little things you can start doing today to make sure that your children, grandchildren and even you are never defeated by failure.

    There exist cruel wars, fighting and sadness in the world today, so it's not only necessary, but also essential to have a good sense of humor just to help us go through difficult times in out lives. Putting a smile on someone's face when you know they are feeling depressed, as the saying goes, makes me feel good and warms my heart.

    How would you feel if you could not joke around with wife, husband, child, co-worker, neighbor, close friend, or even just someone that you are standing in line with at your corner store? I am always saying things that make others smile or laugh, even if I don't know the person I'm joking around with. My Grandma always found humor in everything she did, even if it was the hardest job anyone could imagine. This not only relieves stress in any situation, but also is a common manner to speak to others that are around you.

    I know of a few people that don't have a funny bone in their bodies, as they say. Everyone around them could be rolling on the floor after hearing a great joke and they would sit there without the slightest smile on their faces. They don't get the joke that makes others laugh. I am, busting a gut while they just sit there, looking at me as if I were from outer space. How can people not get a really funny joke?

    Laughing is essential to keep your stress levels under control. Without humor, we would find ourselves with a lot of psychological problems, or on a lot of medications to keep us from going crazy. There is too much sadness and bring a little light into our lives.

    Therefore, I believe our best medicine is to get together and tell some jokes and have some fun laughing together.

    Awarding wining film Ballad From Tibet(《天籁梦想》) by Chinese director Zhang Wei is scheduled to premiere in New York City on Saturday, March 10.

    The film, which tells the story of four visually impaired kids from China's Tibet autonomous region embarking on a journey for their dreams, will be presented at the Bronx Library Center on Saturday, at Mid-Manhattan Library on Sunday, at Lehman College and Marlene Meyerson JCC Manhattan on Tuesday, and at the Museum of Modern Art on Wednesday.

    Based on a true story, Ballad from Tibet is about the four 1ibetan kids—Thupten, Sonam, Kelsang and Droma—achieving their dreams against all odds.

    Thupten is a 10-year-old boy partially sighted in one eye and blind in the other. His doctor says that there is a chance he could completely lose his sight, but there is an operation that could offer a 50 percent chance of saving his vision.

    His teacher firmly suggests that he should have the operation right away, but Thupten is afraid and wants to see the world before his life is plunged into total darkness.

    Along with his three friends who also suffer from blindness, Thupten embarks on an exciting adventure. Together they decide to go to Shenzhen in South China's Guangdong province, a city more than 37,000 km away from Tibetan regional capital Lhasa.

    The reason for the children's decision to go to Shenzhen is their love of music. They are all talented and want to sing their hearts out in front of national audience by participating in a Shenzhen-based reality show.

    The foursome's trip is indeed fun, but also turns out to be dangerous as well. Luckily, help is on hand along the way in the form of a wandering family, a shepherd, a motorcycle club, and a TV producer's assistant.

    Ballad From Tibet has won the award for Best Children's Feature at the 13th China International Children's Film Festival in November 2017, and earned nominations at 17 different international children's film festivals in Germany, Canada, Japan, Greece, Australia and India.

    I always feel sorry for world leaders busy dealing with fights between nations. When my three children were young, most days it was hard to keep my house from becoming a battlefield.

    It got worse as they grew older. Three years ago, Zack, then 16, couldn't make it through a day without making his sisters, Alex 11 and Taryn 9, angry.

    My husband and I tried to be understanding the boy at such an age. We reasoned, punished, and left heartfelt notes on his bed about how he was hurting our family. His answer was "I say it because it's true."

    I even tried telling the girls to fight back. Bad idea. Now I had three children at war. Whatever I said to them, they paid no attention. When there was no way out, I told everything to my sister, Mary, in an email. She replied, "Don't email me. Email him."

    Our son was online every day, mailing and talking with his friends. Maybe he would actually hear me this way. I didn't say anything different, but email just took the tension away. There'd be no shouting or door banging. Zack wouldn't feel under attack.

    Zack didn't reply for days. When he finally did, his entire message was four small words. I smiled when I read them: "You're right. I'm sorry."

    The children still fought, of course, but Zack changed. Best of all, I now have a better way to talk with not one but three of them. I like it that they don't tune me out as much as they used to. They like not having to listen to me shouting to them. Or as Alex says, "You're so much nicer online."

    All I know is that the house is quiet. But we're talking.

    Right in front of the Minneapolis Central Library, a row of green hikes sits parked in a special stand. Each hike is designed with the logo "Nice Ride" the name of the city's bike-share program.

    Nice Ride bikes are a lot like the library books that people come here to borrow. To rent a bike, you simply use your membership card at a Nice Ride bike station. Members can rent one of 1, 200 bikes from 138 stations throughout Minnesota's largest city. People use the Nice Ridebikes to go to work, to go out on business, or just to enjoy the city's many bike paths.

    The rise of bike-share programs like Nice Ride is encouraging more people than ever to choose biking over driving. Skyrocketing gas prices and concerns about the environment have also gotten people to dust off their bike helmets, pump air into flat tires, and hit the road.

    Why ride? Not only is biking good exercise, but switching from a car to a bike also reduces the amount of pollution in the air. Carbon dioxide, a greenhouse gas linked to climate change, is one of the many polluting substances that come out of a car's tailpipe.

    Bike-share systems are found around the world in cities like London, Paris, Barcelona, and Melbourne, Australia. The largest program—with 70, 000 bikes—is in Wuhan, China.

    To make roads friendlier to non-motorists, the U. S. Department of Transportation has invested more than a billion dollars in cycling and pedestrian projects in recent years. The money went toward building thousands of miles of on-street bike lanes and bike-and pedestrian-only passages called greenways.

    Wong Fuk-wing, a Hong Kong volunteer at an orphanage (孤儿院) in Yushu, was killed in the earthquake when he was trying to save others on April 14, 2010.

    Wong managed to run safely out of the building with some children when the first quake happened at 7:50 am on April 14, but he went back inside to rescue three other children and three teachers inside, although he knew the danger of aftershocks (余震).

    At 10 am, all the children and one of the teachers were saved. However, Wong was buried under the fallen building and died. The other two teachers were still waiting to be rescued.

    46-year-old Wong was a truck driver, who often said he could only give his efforts to charity instead of money, as he did not earn a lot. His tragic (悲剧的) end touched the hearts of many people both in Hong Kong and on the mainland.

    Wong began volunteering in 2002. In 2003, Wong was told by the doctor he got serious illness, which gave him a great blow. However, the illness did not deter the warm-hearted man. When the earthquake struck Wenchuan in Sichuan Province in 2008, Wong rushed to the disaster area of Shifang to offer his help though his family did not want him to go.

    In fact, Qinghai is a place Wong had often visited since 2006. As a volunteer, he gave out medicine and clothing to the orphanage there. No one could expect that Wong would die helping others.

    Hong Kong Chief Secretary Henry Tang Ying-yen said he had "the highest respect" for the hero who gave his life for others. "What he did has shown the Hong Kong spirit." The citizens of Hong Kong called him "the pride of Hong Kong's people" and people on the mainland have also praised him as "a true hero".