Building Trust in a Relationship Again

    Trust is a learned behavior that we gain from past experiences. {#blank#}1{#/blank#} Trust is a risk. But you can't be successful when there's a lack of trust in a relationship that results from an action where the wrongdoer takes no responsibility to fix the mistake.

    Unfortunately，we've all been victims of betrayal. Whether we've been stolen from，lied to，misled，or cheated on，there are different levels of losing trust. Sometimes people simply can't trust anymore. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} It's understandable，but if you're willing to build trust in a relationship again，we have some steps you can take to get you there.

    {#blank#}3{#/blank#} Having confidence in yourself will help you make better choices because you can see what the best outcomewould be for your well-being.

    {#blank#}4{#/blank#} If you've been betrayed，you are the victim of your circumstance. But there's a difference between being a victim and living with a “victim mentality”. At some point in all of our lives，we'll have our trust tested or violated.

    You didn't lose “everything”. Once trust is lost，what is left? Instead of looking at the situation from this hopeless angle，look at everything you still have and be thankful for all of the good in your life. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} Instead，it's a healthy way to work through the experience to allow room余地 for positive growth and forgiveness.

A. Learn to really trust yourself.

B. It is putting confidence in someone .

C. Stop regarding yourself as the victim.

D. Remember that you can expect the best in return.

E. They've been too badly hurt and they can't bear to let it happen again. .

F. This knowledge carries over in their attitude toward their future relationships.

G. Seeing the positive side of things doesn't mean you're ignoring what happened.

    Reading makes you a smarter, better leader. But if you've been following the latest science, you'll also know that studies have shown regularly picking up a book might increase your empathy (共鸣) and protect you from feeling lonely, hopeless or suffering from dementia (痴呆) in later life. But obviously, that's not the end of the list. New research has discovered yet another benefit of being a reader who focuses one's mind on reading.

    After following those surveyed based on more than 3,500 adults over age 50 for 12 years, the team from Yale University behind the research found that those who read books for 3.5 hours a week were 23 percent less likely to die. Reading for less than 3.5 hours a week lowered participants' (参加者) risk of death by 17 percent. Put another way, picking up an interesting book could earn you about an extra two years.

    It's worth noticing that the researchers were looking exactly at time spent in reading books, rather than newspapers, magazines, or online media, and that this difference is important for the observed advantages of reading. “We found that reading books provided a greater advantage than reading newspapers or magazines,” said Avni Bavishi of the Yale School of Public Health. “This effect is likely because books attract the readers' mind more — providing more cognitive (认知的) advantages, and therefore increasing the lifespan (寿命). In short, deep slow reading rather than reading quickly and carelessly is best.”

    So how long should you be reading for, and what sort of titles should you pick up? While more reading seems to be better, the researchers suggest that anything more than

    30 minutes a day will be likely to do good to you. As for what exactly to read, the researchers can't yet offer much advice beyond making time for actual books, though they pointed out this was a promising way to future research.

    Many people have long dreamed of being able to fly around as simply as riding a bicycle. Yet the safety and strength of a flying bike was always a big problem. Over the past 10 years, developments in technology have moved the dream of personal flying vehicles closer to reality. Now, two groups of inventors say such vehicles may be available soon.

    The British company Malloy Aeronautics has developed a prototype (原型) of its flying bicycle. Grant Stapleton, marketing sales director of Malloy Aeronautics, says the Hoverbike is able to get in and out of small spaces very quickly. It can be moved across continents very quickly because it can be folded and packed, he adds.

    Mr. Stapleton says safety was the company's main concern. He says the designers solved the safety issue by using overlapping rotors ( 交叠式旋翼 )to power the vehicle.

    The company is testing a full-size prototype of the Hoverbike, which will most likely be used first by the police and emergency rescue teams.

    In New Zealand, the Martin Aircraft Company is also testing a full-size prototype of its personal flying device, called the Jetpack. It can fly for more than 30 minutes, up to 1,000 meters high and reach a speed of 74 kilometers per hour.

    Peter Coker is the CEO of Martin Aircraft Company. He said the Jetpack “is built around safety from the start. In his words, reliability is the most important element of it. We have safety built into the actual structure itself, very similar to a Formula One racing car.”

    The Jetpack uses a gasoline-powered engine that produces two powerful jet streams. Mr. Coker says it also has a parachute (降落伞) that can be used should there be an emergency. “It starts to work at very low altitude and actually saves both the aircraft and the pilot,” he adds. Mr. Coker says the Jetpack will be ready for sale soon.

    Having friends may well keep you healthier and help you deal with stress better. Some studies show that people with close friends have a greater ability to fight disease than people who are alone.

    Place friendship in the first place. Find the time to be with friends even if it means letting the lawn(草坪) go unmowed (未割的) or the dishes unwashed for a while. When you can't get together, use the phone to keep in touch.

    Open up to close friends. Keeping a deep friendship requires a level of “heartfelt” intimacy (亲密).Don't be afraid to express your inner fears and disappointments. Listen to your friends when they have problems， but offer advice only when it's wanted. Help raise friends' self-esteem(自尊) when they are sad about a job loss, or other such events.

    Have different friends for different activities, such as going to the movies， singing in a choir， and joining in a bowling league.

    Don't wait for a friend to ask for helps. When a friend has the flu， offer to go to the store or drive his or her children to their afterschool activities.

    Never take a friendship for granted. Like a good marriage， friendship needs care and patience. Become a joiner. Find a group that matches your interests.

    Talk to strangers. Conversations started in museums, laundry rooms， or bookstores can lead to firm friendship.

    Enroll in an adult education course. A classroom is an ideal place to meet others with similar interests.

    I had an experience some years ago, which taught me something about the ways in which people make a bad situation worse by blaming themselves. One January, I had to hold two funerals for two elderly women in my community. Both had died "full of years", as the Bible would say. Their homes happened to be near each other, so I paid condolence(吊唁) calls on the two families on the same afternoon.

    At the first home, the son of the deceased(过世的)woman said to me, "If only I had sent my mother to Florida and gotten her out of this cold and snow, she would be alive today. It's my fault that she died." At the second home, the son of the other deceased woman said, "If only I hadn't insisted on my mother's going to Florida, she would be alive today. That long airplane ride, the sudden change of climate, was more than she could take. It's my fault that she's dead."

    You see that any time there is a death, the survivors will feel guilty. Because the course of action they took turned out bad, they believe that the opposite course—keeping Mother at home, putting off the operation—would have turned out better. After all, how could it have turned out any worse?

    There seem to be two elements involved in our willingness to feel guilty. The first is our need to believe that the world makes sense, that there is a cause for every effect and a reason for everything that happens. That leads us to find patterns and connections both where they really exist and where they exist only in our minds.

    The second element is the view that we are the cause of what happens, especially the bad things that happen. It seems to be a short step from believing that every event has a cause to believing that every disaster is our fault. The roots of this feeling may lie in our childhood.

    A baby comes to think that the world exists to meet his needs, and that he makes everything happen in it. He wakes up in the morning and summons the rest of the world to his tasks. He cries, and someone comes to attend to him. When he is hungry, people feed him, and when he is wet, people change him. Very often, we do not completely outgrow that childish view that our wishes cause things to happen.

World Poetry Day takes place each year {#blank#}1{#/blank#} March 21 to promote the teaching of poetry, as well as the publishing, writing, and reading of this form of writing around the world.

It {#blank#}2{#/blank#} (declare) by UNESCO in 1999 in the hopes of supporting language diversity through poetic expression and increasing the opportunity for endangered languages {#blank#}3{#/blank#} (hear). World Poetry Day was about giving fresh drive and {#blank#}4{#/blank#} (recognize) to international, regional, and national poetry movements. It also focused on promoting a return to the oral (口头的) tradition of poetry recitals, as well as {#blank#}5{#/blank#} (strengthen) the association between poetry and other forms of expression, such as dance, music, and painting.

The day is celebrated {#blank#}6{#/blank#} (global). Government agencies, community groups and individuals get involved in promoting or participating in the day, which enables children to learn and enjoy {#blank#}7{#/blank#} (variety) of poetry. It is a time {#blank#}8{#/blank#} students are busy examining poets and learning about different types of poetry. Poets may be invited to read and share their work to audience at book stores and schools. Ceremonies are held to honor poets of {#blank#}9{#/blank#} (remark) achievements.

All in all, it's a day for poetry: {#blank#}10{#/blank#} ancient art form that still enriches our understanding of humanity today.