It is not only praise or punishment that determines a child's level of confidence. There are some other important ways we shape our kids—particularly by giving instructions and commands in a negative or positive choice of words. For example, we can say to a child “Don't run into traffic!” or “Stay on the footpath close to me.” In using the latter, you will be helping your kids to think and act positively, and to feel competent in a wide range of situations, because they know what to do, and aren't scaring themselves about what not to do.

    Why does such a small thing make a difference? It is all in the way the human mind works. What we think, we automatically rehearse. For example, if someone offered you a million dollars not to think of a blue monkey for two minutes, you wouldn't be able to do it. When a child is told “Don't fall off the tree,” he will think of two things: “don't” and “fall off the tree”. That is, he will automatically create the picture of falling off the tree in his mind. A child who is vividly imagining falling off the tree is much more likely to fall off. So it is far better to use “Hold on to the tree carefully.”

    Clear, positive instructions help kids to understand the right way to do things. Kids do not always know how to be safe, or how to react to the warning of the danger in negative words. So parents should make their commands positive. “Sam, hold on firm to the side of the boat” is much more useful than “Don't you dare to fall out of the boat?” or worse still “How do you think I'll feel if you drown?” The changes are small but difference is obvious.

    Children learn how to guide and organize themselves from the way we guide them with our words, so it pays to be positive.

    Ever since it was created 30 years ago, The Simpsons, the longest running prime-time (黄金时段) TV show in the country, has become part of US life. So when TV critics Alan Sepinwall and Matt Zoller Seitz ranked the 100 greatest comedies and dramas broadcast in the US, it came as no surprise that The Simpsons was their top choice.

    This was the show that changed the very concept (概念) of cartoons in Western society. Before it appeared, cartoons were considered a way to learn and have fun, not serious adult entertainment. The Simpsons changed this. The genius (过人之处) of the show is that it has something to offer both adults and children.

    It's a hugely entertaining program that's also full of satire (讽刺) and clever humor. A remark by Chitra Ramaswamy in The Guardian gave a sense of the esteem (敬重) in which The Simpsons is held: “Nothing before or since has matched its capacity to be at once so profoundly (深刻地) clever and so unbelievably stupid.”

    The show's creator Matt Groening, and the brilliant team that work with him, make fun of the US government, social customs, and of course, the idea of family life. But unlike classic US prime-time TV characters, the Simpsons are a dysfunctional (功能失调的) family.

    Bart, the boy, is always in trouble – both at home and at school. That may be in part because of his paternal (父亲的) example. Homer Simpson, perhaps the most iconic character, is a beer-swilling (喝着啤酒的), overweight slob (懒汉) who is normally found in front of the TV. And Marge, Homer's wife and the mother of the family, spends most of her time cooking, cleaning or trying to fix the messes that Bart and Homer make.

    The smartest member of the family is daughter Lisa, who excels (表现卓越) at school but is no goody-goody (讨好卖乖的人): Lisa never misses an opportunity to challenge authority. The youngest member of the family is baby Maggie, who will likely be as much a trouble as her brother and sister when she grows up – if she ever grows up, that is.

    But although the Simpsons are a problem family, viewers are always on their side. One of the reasons the show has remained so popular all these years is that the characters are so likeable. Millions of us identify with (同情) them. They are a working class family struggling to make ends meet. They aren't perfect, but then, who is? And after 30 years, this is still what strikes a chord (引起共鸣) with millions of viewers worldwide.

    People seem to have a natural need for friends and with good reason, friends increase your enjoyment of life and relieve feelings of loneliness. They even can help reduce stress and improve your health. Having good friends is especially helpful when you are going through any kind of hard time such as when you are experiencing anxiety, panic(恐慌) attacks, or depression.

    When you are with good friends, you feel good about yourself, and you are glad to be with them. A friends is someone who—

●you like, respect, and trust, and who likes, expects and trusts you, doesn't always understand you, but accepts and likes you as you are, even as you grow and change, allows you the space to change, grow, make decisions, and even make mistakes.

●listens to you and shares with you both the good times and the bad times.

●respects your need for secrets, so you can tell them anything.

●lets you freely express your feelings and emotions without judging, laughing at or criticizing you.

●accepts the limitations you have put on yourself and helps you to remove them.

    A person once said. "Friendship is a continuing source of bonding(连接),releasing, and creating in yourself and with the other person, there is an emotional bond between the two people."

    A good friend or supporter may or may not be the same age or the same sex as you, and may not have the same educational, cultural, or religious background, or share interests that are similar to yours. Friendships also have different depths(深度). Some are closer to the heart and some more superficial, but they're all useful and good.

    Daniella was brushing her daughter's long brown hair when she noticed that bunches of it were coming out. That was January 1, 2017. Within 20 days, seven-year-old Gianessa's hair and eyebrows were completely gone, and her doctor said they would never grow back. Gianessa had become one of the 6.8 million Americans with alopecia, a disease that causes hair loss.

    Alopecia isn't painful, but for kids who suffer from it, the acute mental pain comes from standing out from the crowd. For the most part, the students in Gianessa's first-grade class in Salem, Utah, were understanding. But occasionally, she still felt like an outcast(被排斥者). "I did not want her to not feel beautiful," her mother told Today.

    Then the school announced its "Crazy Hair Day" competition in April, and Daniella and Gianessa decided that rather than hiding Gianessa's baldness(光头), they would celebrate it. Daniella bought sticker jewels and decorated her daughter's head with colorful designs. "They just fit her personality," Daniella told CNN. "She's so full of life."

    On the morning of the competition, Gianessa was nervous. Would her friends think it was funny? She had nothing to fear. Gianessa was a hit—and the winner of the crazy-hair competition. Gianessa is now glad she dared to go bare. "I was sad at first when I lost all my hair," she told People, "but now I love being bald. I can do things to my head that other kids can't. I'm thinking now it might be fun to decorate my head with some shiny butterflies and flowers."

Socially, few things are more annoying than someone repeatedly checking their phone in the middle of your conversation with them. Soon enough, you're having unhappy thoughts, thinking of their way like, I'm boring you; you're more concerned with whoever's on that phone than me; you don't care about me. None of that is necessarily true, but this is: "If someone is engaged in a great conversation, they wouldn't care about their phones," says Leslie, a psychologist and researcher at NYU.

Do you sometimes wonder: What should I have said to a rude person like this? What if we have to talk to such maddening persons? Experts have advice about how to deal with this.

Whether you say something or not, remember that the cell-addict's annoying habits aren't about you. "It's rude, for sure, but sometimes we mistake the behavior for more than what it is," says Leslie. "It's possible that they are facing something tough and merely experiencing nervousness or anxiety," he adds. It's also possible that their partner is stuck with a flat tyre (轮胎) or their kid is sick in hospital. The point is that you don't know.

So before you become angry at the cell-addict's open rudeness, focus instead on building a better conversation than whatever's going down on Instagram. You might never be able to achieve this, given the power of today's social media, so if you're close enough to a person, Leslie advises you to directly ask them: "What's on that thing that's so interesting?" Chances are that they will apologise at once and quickly put the phone away. But if the answer is something real, talk about it. Better yet, you can avoid the situation in advance by saying something like, "I'm really interested in catching up properly, so how about we leave our phones in the car?" If they indeed have that flat tyre or sick kid, at least you won't have to assume that it's because your stories are boring.

  A Tale of Highly Unusual Magic

Genre: Fantasy

Number of Pages: 320

What's the basic story line?

Kai and Leila have never met, but their seemingly dull lives will be drawn together in unbelievable ways. Each girl is vacationing—Kai in Texas and Leila in Pakistan. Each girl finds a copy of a book called The Exquisite Corpse. Each book is blank, but when Kai writes a sentence, the book magically begins a story. When either girl writes another phrase, the book shows more. Whatever the girls are doing when they write—getting attacked by a dog, hunting for a rare species, accidentally buying a goat—helps to develop the plot of The Exquisite Corpse. It also makes reading A Tale of Highly Unusual Magic even more enjoyable.

Are the characters believable? Many aspects of the characters are realistic. Readers see that the characters, like all of us, can sometimes fail. Also, both characters have some unflattering (不讨人喜欢的) qualities, even though they're represented as "the good guys" in the story.

Who would like this book? Any lover of fantasy and stories about magic would enjoy this book. Readers who enjoy knowing things the characters don't, or who like being shocked by a huge plot twist (曲折的情节),will like this book.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate this book? I would rate A Tale of Highly Unusual Magic a perfect 10, because of the creative story idea and the crazy plot twists that keep the reader turning page after page. I, for one, did not want the story to end.