How to Be Confident

    We are all human and have weaknesses. Even if your physical appearance or social skills aren't what you wish they were, that doesn't have to stop you from being confident. {#blank#}1{#/blank#}

    *Make a list of special talents you have, or things you do that are good—morally（道德上） or otherwise. It doesn't have to be a specific skill；it can be an approach or an attitude that you hold through life. {#blank#}2{#/blank#} Are you very patient with people? Do you always see the humorous side of things? Are you always there for your friends?

    {#blank#}3{#/blank#} When you feel strongly about something, speak loudly and clearly and make eye contact with people. People will judge you all the time, and usually they'll misjudge you anyway, so why bother trying to live up to their opinions at all?

    *Take care of yourself. Eat a healthy diet and get enough exercise. Don't abuse your body, don't overload it, and don't deny it any of the things it needs. At the same time, don't obsess(沉迷). {#blank#}4{#/blank#} Those things are only band-aids(权宜之计） and make-up. Confidence comes from within. In order to be confident, you must value yourself and understand that your well-being is important.

    *Improve your posture. {#blank#}5{#/blank#} Don't drop your shoulders. Make sure that your back is straight, your shoulders are square, and your chest sticks out slightly (but stay loose, otherwise you'll appear stubborn （固执的）and nervous). Good posture also helps with deep breathing, which helps with feeling calm and relaxed.

    Four people in England back in 1953, stared at Photo 51,It wasn't much—a picture showing a black X. But three of these people won the Nobel Prize for figuring out what the photo really showed –the shape of DNA The discovery brought fame and fortune to scientists James Watson, Francis Crick, and Maurice Wilkins. The fourth, the one who actually made the picture, was left out.

    Her name was Rosalind Franklin.” She should have been up there,” says historian（历史学家） Mary Bowden.” If her photos hadn't been there, the others couldn't have come up with the structure.” One reason Franklin was missing was that she had died of cancer four years before the Nobel decision. But now scholars（学者）doubt that Franklin was not only robbed of her life by disease but robbed of credit by her competitors

    At Cambridge University in the 1950s, Watson and Click tried to make models by cutting up shapes of DNA's parts and then putting them together. In the meantime, at King's College in London, Franklin and Wilkins shone X-rays at the molecule(分子). The rays produced patterns reflection the shape.

    But Wilkins and Franklin's relationship was a lot rockier than the celebrated teamwork of Watson and Crick, Wilkins thought Franklin was hired to be his assistant .But the college actually employed her to take over the DNA project.

    What she did was produce X-ray pictures that told Watson and Crick that one of their early models was inside out. And she was not shy about saying so. That angered Watson, who attacked her in return, “Mere inspection suggested that she would not easily bend. Clearly she had to to go or be put in her place.”

    As Franklin's competitors, Wilkins, Watson  and Crick had much to gain by cutting her out of the little group of researchers, says historian Pnina Abir-Am. In 1962 at the Nobel Prize awarding ceremony, Wilkins thanked 13 colleagues by name before he mentioned Franklin, Watson wrote his book laughing at her. Crick wrote in 1974 that  “Franklin was only two steps away  from the solution.”

    No, Franklin was the solution. “She contributed more than any other player to solving the structure of DNA . She must be considered a co-discoverer,” Abir-Am says. This was backed up by Aaron Klug, who worked with Franklin and later won a Nobel Prize himself. Once described as the “Dark Lady of DNA”, Franklin is finally coming into the light.

    Thanksgiving Day is a special holiday in the United States and Canada. Families and friends gather to eat and give thanks for their blessing.

    Thanksgiving Day is really a harvest festival. This is why it is celebrated in late fall, after the crops are in. But one of the first thanksgivings in America had nothing to do with a good harvest. On December 4,1619, the Pilgrims from England landed near what is now Charles City, Virginia. They knelt down and thanked God for their safe journey across the Atlantic.

    The first New England Thanksgiving did celebrate a rich harvest. The Pilgrims landed at what is now Plymouth, Massachusetts, in 1620.They had a difficult time and the first winter was cruel. Many of the Pilgrims died. But the next year, they had a good harvest. So Governor Bradford declared a three­day feast (盛宴).The Pilgrims invited Indian friends to join them for their special feast. Everyone brought food.

    In time, other colonies (殖民地) began to celebrate a day of thanksgiving. But it took years before there was a national Thanksgiving Day. During the Civil War, Sarah Josepha Hale persuaded Abraham Lincoln to do something about it. He proclaimed (宣布) the last Thursday of November 1863 as a day of thanksgiving.

    Today, Americans celebrate this happy harvest festival on the fourth Thursday in November. Canadians celebrate Thanksgiving Day in much the same way as their American neighbours. But the Canadian Thanks­giving Day falls on the second Monday in October.

    I grew up with a fat dad 450 pounds at his heaviest. Every week he would try a new diet, and my family ended up eating whatever strange food he was trying at that moment.

    After my third-grade year, my dad landed a life-changing job in Manhattan. My mom, my little sister and I had to move away from our hometown, Chicago, and leave my grandmother and her beautiful food behind.

    Leaving my grandmother was far more frightening than the move to New York City.  There would be no more special weekends at my grandmother's house, the only place I can remember feeling happy, safe and nourished (有营养的). It was what I desired. In this new city, I felt extremely alone and lost, and I missed my grandmother terribly.

    My grandmother knew just how I felt. And she knew the cure. Every week, she would send me a card with a$ 20 bill, a recipe and a list of what to buy at the market. It kept us bonded, and her recipes filled my body and soul.

    Over the years, I have grown to better understand my father's struggles with weight and the toll (代价) it took on him and those who love him. I have come to realize he was driven not by vanity (自负) or selfishness as much as by a deep pain, I  And in spite of growing up in such an unhealthy eating environment ( or perhaps be-cause of it), as an adult I found a passion and a career as a nutrition consultant.

    Today, my father weighs 220 pounds and is a vegan(素食者). How he got there is a story I hope to share in the coming weeks. More importantly, food is no longer a barrier that keeps us apart, but a bridge that keeps us connected. There is nothing my dad enjoys more than talking with me about dietary theories and his weightloss victories. And now I am the one regularly sending recipe cards to my father s house, just as my grandmother did for me.

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    Your colleague's sharp comment keeps replaying in your mind. Two of your students are trapped in a "he said/she said" battle. When you reflect on your emotional reactions, you sometimes get caught up in cycles of negative feelings, which can make you feel even worse. If so, the answer may lie in a skill called "self-distancing", the ability to take a step back and view yourself more objectively. According to a research, when people adopt self-distancing while discussing a difficult event, they make better sense of their reactions, experience less emotional suffering, and display fewer signs of stress.

    But what might self-distancing look like in action? Consider a typical "he said/she said" student conflict where they are each focusing on their own feelings. One is thinking, "I can't believe he did that to me." And another insists, "She really hurt my feelings." However, if you ask them to take the self-distancing, they might step outside of themselves and ask broader questions: "Why was he so hurt in this situation?" or "How did her anger affect him?"

    Although this approach may sound too simple to be effective, studies indicate that a change in point of view can have a powerful effect on the way people think, feel, and behave. Here are several different techniques you can try.

    First, consider how a thoughtful friend might respond after quietly observing their situation. Besides, avoid using the pronoun "I". Focus on using third-person pronouns, he, she, they, and they were able to see the stressful event as challenging rather than threatening. Finally, ask yourself, "How would I feel about this one week from now or ten years from now?" This form of mental time travel may be effective because our attention is directed away from our immediate, concrete circumstances.